Flotsam and Jetsam

Speaking of idiots

2008-12-19T16:17:00.003-06:00

Haven't been on FactCheck or PolitiFact in quite some time. Ruminating on The Recount made me think of them, so I hit them both out of curiosity to see where they are, post-election. Found this sad, sad article on FactCheck. Man.

-----------------------

Our Disinformed Electorate

December 12, 2008

by Kathleen Hall Jamieson and Brooks Jackson

We saw more aggressive fact-checking by journalists in this election than ever before. Unfortunately, as a post-election Annenberg Public Policy Center poll confirms, millions of voters were bamboozled anyway.

More than half of U.S. adults (52 percent) said the claim that Sen. Barack Obama’s tax plan would raise taxes on most small businesses is truthful, when in fact only a small percentage would see any increase.

More than two in five (42.3 percent) found truth in the claim that Sen. John McCain planned to "cut more than 800 billion dollars in Medicare payments and cut benefits," even though McCain made clear he had no intent to cut benefits.

The first falsehood was peddled to voters by McCain throughout his campaign, and the second was made in a pair of ads run heavily in the final weeks of the campaign by Obama.

These aren’t isolated examples. One in four (25.6 percent) of those who earned too little to have seen any tax increase under Obama's plan nevertheless believed that he intended to "increase your own federal income taxes," accepting McCain's repeated claims that "painful" tax hikes were being proposed on "families." Nearly two in five (39.8 percent) thought McCain had said he would keep troops in combat in Iraq for up to 100 years, though he’d actually spoken of a peacetime presence such as that in Japan or South Korea. Close to one in three (31 percent) believed widely disseminated claims that Obama would give Social Security or health care benefits to illegal immigrants, when in fact he would do neither.

We’re not surprised. As we wrote in "unSpun: finding facts in a world of disinformation," the same thing happened in 2004 when majorities of voters believed untrue things that had been fed to them by the Bush and Kerry campaigns.

One reason is obvious: Political ads run thousands of times and reach far more people than articles on FactCheck.org. On our best day, we were read by 462,678 visitors. By contrast, the Obama campaign aired two ads claiming that McCain planned to cut Medicare benefits a total of 17,614 times at a cost estimated to be more than $7 million – which is several times more than FactCheck.org's entire annual budget.

There are deeper reasons as well. We humans all have a basic disposition to embrace our side's arguments and reject or ignore those offered by an opponent. Our polling reflects that. After taking differences in age, race, gender and education into account, Republicans were still 4.4 times more likely than Democrats to believe that Obama would raise taxes on most small businesses, and Democrats were 3.2 times more likely than Republicans to believe that McCain would cut Medicare benefits. Simply put, partisanship trumps evidence.

This also helps explain why so many people accept the most preposterous claims circulated by chain e-mail messages and ignorant or irresponsible bloggers. Our poll found nearly one in five (19 percent) falsely think Obama is a Muslim, and even more (22 percent) find truth in the claim that he’s nearly half Arab. Republicans were 2.8 times more likely than Democrats to buy the Muslim claim, and just over twice as likely to swallow the half-Arab notion.

This is "group think" in action. We humans tend to marry, date, befriend and talk with people who already agree with us, and hence are less likely to say, "Wait a minute – that’s just not true."

Consultants also dupe us by exploiting our partisan preconceptions. People tend to believe Democrats are more likely than Republicans to raise taxes, so McCain was pushing on an open door when he repeatedly claimed Obama would raise taxes on ordinary voters, and not just the most affluent. By the same token, Obama found it easy to sell his bogus claim that McCain planned to cut Medicare benefits by 22 percent, because Republicans have a reputation as opponents of social programs.

Voters aren’t highly knowledgeable about government to begin with. Our poll shows that nearly one in three (31 percent) think Congress or the president, not the Supreme Court, have the final call on whether laws are constitutional. Nearly one in 10 (9.9 percent) think Republicans still control the House of Representatives, even though they’ve had two years to catch up on results of the 2006 elections.

And voters, once deceived, tend to stay that way despite all evidence. Nearly half in our poll (46 percent) agreed that Saddam Hussein played a role in the attacks of September 11, even though no solid evidence has ever emerged to support this notion.

None of this bodes well for the future, in our view. Spending hundreds of millions of dollars on campaigns that systematically disinform the public can only make the task of governing harder for the eventual winner. But are we discouraged that our efforts didn’t prevent this? Not at all. If we hadn’t tried, it might have been worse.

Kathleen Hall Jamieson is director of the University of Pennsylvania’s Annenberg Public Policy Center. Brooks Jackson is director of the APPC project FactCheck.org. They are co-authors of "unSpun, finding facts in a world of disinformation."

The Annenberg post-election poll was conducted by Princeton Survey Research Associates International, which interviewed 3,008 adults in the continental United States by telephone from Nov. 5 through Nov. 18, 2008. The margin of sampling error for the complete set of weighted data is ±2.3 percent.

Idiots on parade

2008-12-19T14:50:00.003-06:00

Jay Weiner of MinnPost had this description of the recount process today:

"That’s what happens when you diligently examine 500 ballots filled out by people who are older than 18 but, for reasons known only to them, can’t fill in an oval with their pens."

I believe this is so far my favorite.

Well, then, Weiner also had this to say. This is a close 2nd:

"...like when the chief justice of the Supreme Court examines a ballot filled with scribbles, seemingly by a third-grader, but by an adult from Plymouth, Ward 4, Precinct 20."

Wow. Some people are just plain dumb. Dumb. It almost makes a person wonder if maybe a basic intelligence test should be required for voting. IQ must be above _ _ _ to enter here.

Would almost guarantee that certain political parties would never elect anyone ever again.

Ooo... did I just type that out loud? *grin*

Participatory Democracy

2008-11-02T22:47:00.004-06:00

All hail Dr. Robert Adler, the inventor of the 1956 Zenith Space Command wireless remote; the inventor of the mute button. I cannot wait until Wednesday, November 5th. It makes me long for the days of annoying Subway commercials. It's literally one 30 second long vicious political attack after another - roughly 8 minutes of hell per 1/2 hour. It's making me a bit nostalgic for George III.

In slightly scarier news, I had a neighbor ask me today where we voted. I believe she's lived here longer than I have. WTH has she been doing these last couple of years? I never understood the old Federalist concept (assuming I am remembering correctly that this idea comes from the Federalists) that the people can't necessarily be trusted to elect their own government, but the more idiots I see, the smarter John Adams becomes. I surely wish people would educate themselves. It's not like it's hard.

The fact that people actually believe what they see in TV ads. Talk about a WTH.

Latest annoyance

2008-10-15T06:34:00.002-05:00

I am heartily tired of the StarTribune having pop-ups come up whenever you click on stories like some cheesy crap site.

That is all.

Ugh.

2008-10-14T19:23:00.005-05:00

Do not go gentle into that good night
Old age should burn and rave at close of day
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

HA!

I'm beat. Been a slave for animals of the two legged and four legged persuasion for 12 hours straight, including over lunch. Adding getting ready this morning (more slaving - 4 legged), it's about 14 on my feet and running. This is the first time I've had to myself all day.

Taking care of the cats of some neighbors while they're out of town. They (the cats) are runners, so I've got a contraption set up in front of the door so they at least have to leap before they can get out. It looks ridiculous, but has worked so far. They (the neighbors) are... interesting... *sigh* I'm calling it my corporeal work of mercy. Sometimes spiritual. Depending. Anyway, they're nice cats, and it's fairly little fuss. Just time. Between that and feeding and changing the litter of my own two, it's been a long day.

Very late at work tonight. About 4 hours overtime. 'Cepting I don't get paid overtime. Anyway. I just couldn't get anything to work. Printed some stuff and it took me an hour to get it, between the printer being out of paper and people needing me. Couldn't get the laptop to work, then couldn't get the wireless to work. Couldn't eat, drink, hit the restroom due to people asking questions, needing to speak with me, etc. Man. Luckily I was able to leave 2 hours earlier than I was supposed to. My colleagues are there as we speak. Something to be said for exchange time.

Short term memory problems

2008-10-13T22:24:00.006-05:00

I just cut my inbox size in half! Terribly exciting. Granted, this still means I have over 100 messages. In one of five e-mail accounts I have. But the biggest one has been sliced.

I've also updated three of the four blogs I maintain today. Another positive. ;)

Decided to change poems. That first one was too much. OK, so I'm typing from memory here... the punctuation might not be accurate...

FIRST FIG
Edna St. Vincent Millay

My candle burns at both ends
It will not last the night
But ah, my foes and oh, my friends
It gives a lovely light.

So one down, anyway. Think I'm going to go for a longer one next:

Do not go gentle into that good night
old age something something raving something
Rage, rage against something...

Aw, heck.

Poem #1

2008-10-09T22:01:00.001-05:00

Ah yes - didn't I say I needed to get around to memorizing some poems? Gotta get on that.
------------------------------------

For Whom the Bell Tolls

John Donne

No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manner of thine own
Or of thine friend’s were.
Each man’s death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.

Decisions, decisions

2008-10-09T21:45:00.004-05:00

In my always awesome life, I just got updated on my Quicken enough to determine that increases in taxes and health insurance have adjusted my cost-of-living raise to the point where I am making a grand total of $0.18 more per month. Am, obviously, pumped beyond all telling, especially due to my incredible new workload and the 2-4 hours per day I put in of overtime. I am not certain yet towards what I will put this increase of $2.16 per year... perhaps gas for my yacht. Half a gallon of milk? A pound of butter (on sale)? One sock? Half a shirt sleeve? Hmm....

Luckily, I will have time to think as I will need to save up for this huge purchase. Wouldn't want to waste my raise.

Doggie paddling

2008-10-06T22:43:00.002-05:00

Spent much of this evening creating a "to-do" list. You know you have too much when... Anyway, it does fit on one page. In 8 point font, 'tis true, but it is on one page. So at least there's a direction to my frantic splashing as I go down for the third time.

I did get gas for $2.83 this afternoon, though, so that was a mighty big plus.

Blathering

2008-10-05T21:42:00.003-05:00

So the 40th Anniversary Party From Hades was last night. It went extremely well. I will be eating roast beef and turkey sandwiches until sometime in April 2013, but it went well. Everyone RSVPed except two of my cousins - one who I knew wouldn't come as they live several thousand miles from here, and one who I knew wouldn't come as that's the way things have been lately. I was mightily pooped today. Went to bed finally somewhere between 12:30 and 1. The folks came over today and we ate up some more of the leftovers and I sent them home with quite a few as well. So it was good.

Also took a few to update my 101 goals list. I need to get moving as I should really be at a 1 per 10 days pace. Have been slowly working on one or two but need to knock more off. Am going to start memorizing poems, I think. Can do those fairly fast...

Update

2008-10-01T22:31:00.002-05:00

Eternal rest grant unto her, O Lord.
And may perpetual light shine upon her.
May she rest in peace.
Amen.

Horsemen

2008-10-01T20:42:00.003-05:00

In today's sign of the Apocalypse, I have decided that there are three - count them, three - television shows not on PBS that I like.

I shall pause here whilst you pick your jaw up from the floor. Be sure to dust off the cat hair and Cheeto crumbles before they fall on your keyboard.

Nowthen.

Three! This is a new world's record only surpassed for my childhood love for Sesame Street, Mr. Rogers Neighborhood, The Electric Company, and The Muppet Show.

Wait. Three of those four are on PBS... Dang.

Anyway, the three are these:
Chuck (NBC, Monday, 7 p.m.)
Pushing Daisies (CBS, Wednesday, 7 p.m.)
The Office (NBC, Thursday, 8 p.m.)

There's clever writing, there's great characters, there's humor, there's pathos. I care about what happens. I actually turn on the TV and even pay attention. Wild.

P.S. It bugs me to no end that when I Googled "the muppet show," I got Disney. That is just wrong. Wrong, I tell you. Wrong.

One day closer

2008-09-30T22:03:00.005-05:00

A bit of an odd day today. Odd few weeks. Am doing all sorts of insanities at work, coupled with planning a rather large party, coupled with my great-aunt in the hospital due to die pretty much any minute now.

So the great-aunt thing. We went to visit her in the hospital this afternoon. She's out of it. Rather comatose, looks nothing like herself, etc. In hospice, for all practical purposes. I forget exactly what they called it at the hospital - palliative care, I guess. Extremely caring, professional nursing staff. Nice room. Which takes nothing away from the fact that she's quite obviously down for the count and the ref is right around 9.

It's not like we were terribly close. I mean, I've known her all my life, of course. My grandmother on that side had 11 brothers and sisters and she's one of the ones I saw the most of. But a great-aunt is different than an aunt. Or a grandmother, for that matter.

Thing is, it's occurred to me that she's the last one of that generation left. Both sides of the fam. She dies, we all move up the conveyor belt one notch.

That's a little unsettling. OK, a lot unsettling.

See, the older I get, the more I understand one of the wisest things a teacher ever said to me. She told me she felt perennially 16, because she taught 16 year olds. That's who she saw all day, every day. Lesson learned, of course, is the old saw about how you're as young as you feel, blah blah blah. Still, wise, really, especially the way she put it.

I feel the same as I've always felt - perennially 16, one could say. That's an exaggeration, but I don't feel like I used to think from a 16 year old perspective that people my age should feel. Aren't I the same person I've always been? I haven't settled down, I haven't - God forbid - settled. I refuse to settle.

But yet, somehow, I've gone up one more notch. Without me quite realizing it, that time, it keeps slipping. How on earth did this happen when I haven't gotten any older? Why do I feel like I have so much left to do and so little time and so little accomplished so far?

As some smart dude once said, "Watch out, then, because you do not know the day or the hour."

Duty

2008-09-28T22:40:00.002-05:00

Am attempting to blog more often as one of the things on The List. Every Sunday, minimum. We'll see how that goes. ;)

Just spent entirely too long doing something the long way as the departmental budget won't allow for the most efficient method.*sigh* So I spend quality time at home, slaving away. But, I have a job. I have a job. No mean feat in this current economy.

Oh, but wait. I'm sorry. I'm whining again. I'll just stop that right now and I'm sure the economy will clear right up.

It's drizzling a little. I love that sound. So peaceful.

This is a test, this is only a test

2008-09-24T08:44:00.001-05:00

Just trying to see what happens if I type now and try to post later...

Went to the game tonight (Tues). Awesome! Won 9-3, much fun had by all. Crowd was a tad obnoxious towards the opposing team due to the rivalry, so that was fun. Idiot kid jumped on the field. Bet THAT'S going to be a fun phone call home to his parents...

ETA: Yes, it does work! Imagine that... ;)

Kyrie Eleison

2008-09-22T22:31:00.002-05:00

Again, I must say, WTH is with people?

So a colleague today basically decided the world revolves around her, and asked me to change my schedule to suit her needs. Now, she does have some extremely legitimate concerns, don't get me wrong. However, as amazing as I might be, I do not have the power to single-handedly change a schedule that affects a good 1600+ other people.

She then, of course, in the time-honored tradition of the many who feel they are an incarnation of Ra (see: Bush, George W.), decided that her best course of action was to threaten to take her ball and go home.

In other words, this was not a productive conversation.

I promised her I'd look at my schedule and see if I could tweak things. I did. Spent a good hour and a half this evening - for which, I might add, I did not get paid as I am not an hourly employee - on the project. No insight struck.

So I have little other choice but to take this to a supervisor, dump the problem in her lap, and hope.

A little flexibility in this life works wonders. One would wish everyone was willing to be flexible. And realize that Copernicus had it all figured out a long time ago.

But I don't have a squirrel in my house like other people I can name. Could be worse. ;)

Rant of the Day

2008-09-20T22:33:00.001-05:00

I just got back from Cub. It's 10:30 p.m. There were more small children there than I could conveniently count.

WTH is with people?

101

2008-09-15T22:26:00.004-05:00

How sad is that that the Blogger Dashboard changed and I just found out about it?

Current odd bee in the bonnet:
http://triplux.com/dayzero/

I'm not entirely certain how it will go. I've got a draft list set but need to do some revamping. Some things are a little too vague, others not likely attainable in the allotted time. But it gets me off my butt, and that is always a good thing. Have already knocked off one thing, and another is going down Friday for sure. Progress is being made on a couple more all the time. It'll be an interesting journey.

One of the things that struck me is by the time I've finished, I will have completed 15 years in my current career. A milestone, that.

I don't do nearly enough thinking and evaluating. Perhaps this will help change that.

Reality TV

2008-08-11T23:08:00.003-05:00

As happens every two years, I'm in the middle of spending exorbitant amounts of time glued to the TV. It's easier during the summer, but it doesn't stop me during the winter. I'm up past 11 every night, watching events unfold some 6000 miles away. It's thrilling, fascinating, and heartbreaking all at once. It's an addiction.

I feel a bit like an idiot yelling "Go! Go! Go!" at the TV. I mean, they're thousands of miles away, and wouldn't hear me through the tube even if we were on the same continent. But that doesn't stop me. I even sometimes get a little teary-eyed, watching these people - kids, really - at the topof their game, trying the hardest they've ever tried.

Citius, Altius, Fortius. So true. So true.

Cole Porter tells the truth

2008-07-30T15:39:00.005-05:00

It's hot. I don't like it.

If I weren't so friggin' cheap, I'd turn on the AC. But I'm cheap. So it's not on. So I whine, as if that's going to make it all better. And I'm going to be whining that it's too cold in a few months. What on earth is wrong with me?

Speaking of being cheap, have been scanning the 'net for deals and trying to become as frugal as possible. Gas prices, along with everything going up except my salary... well, we're all in the same boat, aren't we? I've always had a tendency to DIY and it's getting more and more pronounced.

Anyway, there's a million sites out there. Here's a few I like to read. I've been getting the paper and clipping coupons, writing for freebies, reading blogs, etc. One does wonder how much time I'll have for this when work kicks in hard in a couple of weeks...

Frugal Dutchess
Wise Bread
Simple Dollar
Lifehacker
SmallNotebook
Apartment Therapy and related sites
About.com Freebies
About.com Coupons
About.com Frugal Living

What can Brown do for you?

2008-07-15T09:52:00.003-05:00

Oof. Why oh why did I volunteer to help my father at work? I ended up driving all over creation, making 6 deliveries for a total of 1000 pounds of lugging crap, not exaggerating. I'm not in pain; just freakin' exhausted. And dirty. And smelly. And hot. I have a whole new appreciation for folks who do this for a living. There's a lot to be said for an office job.

I don't ordinarily get like this, but I'm so proud of Justin (not Jason!) Morneau I can't even stand it. What a guy. 'Bout time he gets a little more credit. He's so unassuming, folks forget about him. But some of us know.

This time of year there's about a million little summer events and festivals. Summer's so short in the Midwest, we have to be outside when we have the chance. Went to yet another one recently. Love the things, really. You're outside, they're generally free, and as we landed free parking as well things turned out rather well. Concert was pretty good; food was overpriced. Some darn fine musicians.

Quote of the day from Twins manager Ron Gardenhire - I just love the last sentence: "We don't strike out. ... We're pretty good at putting the ball in play, shortening your swing, and understanding all of that. I think that probably bodes well for getting some hits. We chop balls, bloop balls. Put it in play and run like hell."

Humanity

2008-07-12T11:19:00.004-05:00

I've been staying up way too late recently. I don't know why. This happens every summer - I hit a stretch where I just can't get to bed before 1. This of course makes the next day a little odd but there it is. Anyway.

This means I've been watching late night TV. I've decided I just don't like most of it. Leno's jokes are all the same, every night, and are all mean and mostly about sex. He panders to the lowest common denominator, and part of what bugs me is he never used to. Dave is much better, smarter, funnier, but I usually (there are exceptions) don't like his interviews and still there's this retread aspect to it. Easy for me to say - these guys have to be funny every night and in Letterman's case that's for a good 25 years - but it's mostly about sex and making fun of people. They take the easy road. Can't stand Conan. That's unfunny slapstick, with again the sex and making fun of people. And his band leader drives me crazy; good musician, but annoying. The interviews are all about shilling for some movie or book, and people - both the interviewer and the interviewee - are obviously going through the motions. Leno, Dave, and Conan - they don't trust their audiences to be smart. But what do I do? Flip around and try to find the good parts best I can and then get mad when I can't. Why do I do this to myself? I'm an idiot.

Until Craig Ferguson comes on. I like Craig. He's a little manic, a little weird, and I don't always like the sketches, but he's smart and he trusts the audience to be smart. His monologues are different every night, not just the same old retread jokes from the previous night. He seems to be actually interested in the people he interviews. He appears to actually think. He's willing to be brave and try stuff. Sure, there's some making fun of people, there's some sex jokes, but he has more than one note to play on.

So I was dinging around a bit last night and looked him up online to try to find biography stuff. Was wondering if he was a musician, truthfully, as I noticed in the credits he performed the theme song on the show (he has no band). He does play drums. Anyway, Google being the marvelous thing that it is, one thing led to another and I found a wonderful video on YouTube.

Craig, you see, is a recovering alcoholic. He makes no bones about that on his show, occasionally making cracks about his previous life and the things that happened before he got sober in 1992. One of the things about him is that going along with the willingness to be brave, the trust in his audience, and all that, he's also willing to be serious. This little clip dates from February 2007, during the whole hoo-ha over Brittany Spears and the whole concept of battering and making fun of those who truly need help.

What the hell is wrong with our society that we insist on stomping on those already downtrodden?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7bbaRyDLMvA

Various blather

2008-07-06T15:57:00.005-05:00

Duh. Duh. And more Duh.

*sigh*

On the job front, I received my full time contract yesterday. So I'm OK. Still don't know exactly what I'll be doing in a couple of months, but I have a full time job for certain. I cannot begin to communicate the feeling of relief when I opened my mail yesterday afternoon.

Went serious power shopping yesterday with M to help her get ready for her cruise. We stopped at three places before we even got to the mall, and then we went hard core. My dogs gave up barking a long time ago in order to lay down and die. Happily, I have finally managed in my old age to get the concept of window shopping. I got out of this deal about $3 poorer - a lunch bag, as the old one is finally trashed after about 8 years. Am rather proud of my new-found frugal ways. Here's hoping I can manage to hang on to them; with gas prices the way they are, everything is increasing except my salary.

Gettysburg

2008-07-03T20:11:00.005-05:00

“Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.” - Mark Twain

I know I've posted parts of this before, but I believe it's the sort of thing that it is impossible to read and reflect upon too frequently. Happy Fourth - and 1st, 2nd, and 3rd - of July.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Among the units at Gettysburg on July 1st, 2nd and 3rd, 1863 was the First Minnesota Volunteer Infantry. Minnesota governor Alexander Ramsey happened to be in Washington at the time South Carolina seceded from the Union, and was the first governor to offer troops to fight; therefore the First Minnesota was the first volunteer regiment of any state to be offered for the Union cause.

On July 2nd, during the battle at Gettysburg, the First was ordered to fill in a gap in the Union line until the area could be reinforced. Of 262 men who were ordered to attack, 215 ended the day killed, missing, or wounded. The following day, this same unit helped to repel Pickett’s Charge. The First Minnesota has the highest losses in any one battle (by total number of men) of the entire Civil War.

General Winfield Scott Hancock later said of the First,
“I had no alternative but to order the regiment in. We had no force on hand to meet the sudden emergency. Troops had been ordered up and were coming on the run, but I saw that in some way five minutes must be gained or we were lost. It was fortunate that I found there so grand a body of men as the First Minnesota. I knew they must lose heavily and it caused me pain to give the order for them to advance, but I would have done it (even) if I had known every man would be killed. It was a sacrifice that must be made. The superb gallantry of those men saved our line from being broken. No soldiers on any field, in this or any other country, ever displayed grander heroism.”

GETTYSBURG ADDRESS

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation, so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate—we can not consecrate—we can not hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

Happy freakin' fourth

2008-07-02T22:15:00.004-05:00

Whoever decided that fireworks should be legal really should be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. Not professional shows; those are amazing. I mean amateurs. I hate amateurs. It's a combination of being afraid someone is going to blow something up (or set something on fire) that will affect me somehow, and the idiots shooting things off when I'd really rather be sleeping. Some folks are inconsiderate, brain dead morons.

I love professional displays but am generally afraid to go out in public to watch them. Why? Drunken idiots who seem to feel they need to set off bottle rockets into the crowd and hand sparklers to 3 year olds. I've been to fireworks displays in multiple cities, in multiple states, and anywhere with legal fireworks, it's always the same.

The closer we get to the 4th, the worse it gets. Night after night, boom boom crackle crackle, from as soon as darkness falls until 10:30/11. Generally speaking, I see the point of personal rights and the government staying out of our hair but all too often these people are so busy asserting their rights that they don't grasp how they affect other folks' right to personal safety, a reasonably quiet sleep, and people just plain leaving us alone. One of the scariest things I ever saw was at the house of some friends. One of the folks there was peeling back the paper on the fuse of a soon-to-be-airborne shell, cigarette dangling out of his mouth, beer in his other hand. All I could think was, thank God there's a lake in front of us I can dive into if I catch fire.

If people were safe about it and considerate, than I wouldn't really care. But it's apparently too much to ask.

Speaking of considerate folks, the elephants upstairs are back. The pounding is pretty constant. I hadn't heard them for a while and had hoped that meant they'd moved. But no. Thumpthumpthump squeaksqueak thump. Runrunrunrunrunrunboom. Thump. Elephants: the most likely conclusion. Interior designing elephants who are constantly rearranging their furniture in new and exciting ways. Nothing else could possibly explain it.

Downstairs this evening there were a bunch of folks singing in Spanish at the tops of their lungs. It sounded like it could have been a religious service - I don't know much Spanish but thought I caught something about Jesus. I'm holding out hope for an isolated incident. If I have elephants living above me and Bible thumping revivalists below I'm never going to make it through the summer.

My kingdom for some soundproofing. Or at least quieter neighbors.

More blah blah blah

2008-06-30T15:32:00.007-05:00

There's an article in today's paper about the local schools and their test results under No Child Left Behind, that boil on the face of education in the United States. I was interested to see that in the paper's rather unscientific poll, results are running about two to one against testing as a reliable way to judge a school. Now if only the idiots that are running things in this country would get a clue before everything really goes to hell...

I just get so pissed at these people who seem to think the schools stink and it's all the fault of the schools when they don't bother to look in their own backyard. It's not the teachers who should be raising your child, it's you. If you value education, chances are your child will too. If you are interested in their education, they will be too. If you see to it they do their homework, if you keep on them about their test scores, if you go to their games and concerts and events, if you show your child you care about them, it will show in their learning and how they are as human beings. If you buy them stuff and hope that makes up for it, that will show as well. You reap what you sow, people. Get with it.

In the "you learn something new every day" category, I just found out there exists a professional women's tackle football league with 39 teams and 7 more in the 2009 expansion. No kidding.
National Women's Football Association
You go, girls.

Went to the dentist today and of course they had forgotten to write my appointment down and so there was no record of it. Good thing I had today off anyway; I was able to take it philosophically. The person who made the mistake wasn't in at the time but - serious points for her - called me later to apologize. Service like that is rare these days, and very much appreciated.

Side note: darn hard to do anything with the computer when the cat is using the "enter" key for a pillow.

History Detectives season premiere is tonight, which makes me pretty close to the happiest clam in existence. This just may be my favorite TV show, period.

Nothingness, really

2008-06-16T21:43:00.004-05:00

More proof that people have no clue - I now know everything about the spat a neighbor of mine is having with her boyfriend, as does everyone else on the block. Don't have your phone conversations on the deck in a courtyard at 10 p.m., honey. And many of us would appreciate it if you'd stop dropping the f-bomb every other word.

I'm not so fond of sports in general, but the recent US Open was astounding. Wow. Occasionally, I get a glimpse of why people obsess over these things... Baseball, however, is an exception. Am heading to a game tomorrow and apparently the tickets are to the point I'd be bringing my glove if I had any idea where it was. Can't wait for the dog. Yummers.

Today was a tad entertaining. After work met a friend for coffee that I rarely get to see and then went to M's for dinner, so that was cool. M and I have decided we need to be on a diet kick, so that'll be a blast, I'm sure. Hate that crap. But.

Work today and tomorrow will be joyous - putting a bunch of data together for the Board. I spent much of today crunching numbers, which sure as heck ain't my favorite. Interesting, the data. But the number crunching part sucks. But again, it's a job. I can pay rent and buy cat food.

Flooding is bad for many of my friends. We've been lucky - nothing here. My former apartment is underwater at least a little bit - can't quite tell from the photos. My decision to move is looking better and better...

Nothing to say, really, just figured I should update. Best hit the sack. Morning has come a little too early these past few.

404 Error: Romance Not Found

2008-06-15T22:15:00.002-05:00

I love the Internet. God, I love the Internet.

http://www.google.com/romance/index.html

There are stories to tell of things that happened today; suffice to say I don't feel like telling them right now. I'm tired and going to bed. :)

Happy Father's Day to all, and to all a good night.

Not much new

2008-06-14T13:10:00.005-05:00

Not much new; it's nice outside for a change but I gather it's supposed to rain again this afternoon. Rain, rain, rain. But we haven't had problems with flooding as opposed to a fair amount of the surrounding terrain, so I need to just shut up.

Glad it's nice so far as it's Trench today and it sucks when Trench weather isn't up to snuff. There's likely to be Wii later tonight as well, which is always good for a laugh or two.

Spent a fair bit of time at work this past week, mainly doing training and going over test results. Not terribly exciting, but I got paid, which is always good. My colleagues were entertaining, which is also a plus. Learned a fair bit in a technology training session and got some ideas about some stuff I can do for an organization that I'm a board member of, so that was worthwhile. That and our trainer was terribly entertaining.

M and I got pedicures this past week, which was a good time. We had them done at a cosmology school, which makes the price a bit more within reach. We meandered around the mall for a while as well. Nice sale at Bath and Body Works.

Heading to a ball game on Tuesday, which will be fun although I'm sure they'll lose. Been that kind of season. Haven't hung out with that group of friends in a while, though, so it will be a good time. Headed on a road trip a few days later to visit a college roommate. Going to be a total girl thing, which will be a good time.

Best get moving so I'm not too late to Trench...

SOTD, job update, heckuva good story

2008-06-08T19:17:00.006-05:00

Song Of The Day: Dimming of the Day

I had forgotten how much I like this. It's just lovely. Simple and sweet and lovely. B gave me a mix tape many years ago with Bonnie Raitt's recording on it. I'd somehow never heard it before. I was reminded of it today as I heard bits of this week's PHC - go to their website to catch Ms. Raitt and what I believe is the composer himself singing the song live: http://prairiehome.publicradio.org/. That girl's got some pipes.

PHC is a grand gift to humanity. It's so good to know the old time radio variety show still exists. And with music to rock anyone's world. I laugh, I cry. Every week.

Anyway, back to SOTD: The song was written by Richard Thompson and first recorded by him in 1975, I think.
Lyrics and suchlike here: http://www.richardthompson-music.com/song_o_matic.asp?id=74

Job update:

I found out as of Friday that I am going to be full time. My job is changing in ways I don't care for much at all, but I'll be able to pay rent and buy cat food. I have no reason to complain: we're losing 34 folks from our building alone. 34. Out of something like 70-80. Granted, some are transfers and a few are retiring, but... 34.

We had a big breakfast meeting at the OCB on Friday and among other things, my boss asked all leaving to stand and be recognized and thanked for all they've done. She read off the names of everyone who was leaving. It sounded like she was reading off a list of war dead. God. And then to make the comparison even more unfortunately apt, they showed a PowerPoint with pictures of all those leaving with some sappy song as the soundtrack. Luckily for me, the song contained Willie Nelson, so I was able to keep some perspective. Still, not my favorite meeting ever.

This whole thing has sucked for months now and even though I finally have some vague clue what's happening, it's going to continue to suck. It's just going to suck in ways I don't yet fully comprehend.

Anyway.

Not totally related, but as the job is much slower in the summer I've spent the weekend coming up with a list of summer projects. It's huge. I get so little done during the other months. Finally thought of a decent way to describe my job. Nine months of the year I belong to other people. Three months I belong to myself.

And, well, it's closer to 9 1/2 and 2 1/2, but that's another thing.

So here's the best story I've had for quite a while.

Several of us went out after work on Thursday. We went out after work on Wednesday too, but I digress. Anyway. We started at an establishment on campus, had a couple of coneys and then wandered across the street for a fishbowl. Life was good - hey, we weren't at work. We hopped back into our cars to drive maybe 1/2 mile south to yet another establishment. It was closed, but the biker establishment next door was open, so we wandered in. What nice people. A bit of a townie (not in the British sense) place - everyone knew each other's names, they had pull tabs, everything was dirt cheap - but we like that kind of place. Everyone was terribly friendly, including our waitress.

So for whatever reason, J and K wanted to do pull-tabs. I tend to avoid that sort of thing as Throwing Money Down A Rat Hole Which I Can Ill Afford, but what the heck, it does go to charity, and we were celebrating. K calls pull-tabs "paper crack," which is easily the best definition I've ever heard. Anyway. We all chuck in a few bucks, J goes over to the booth which is in every townie establishment I've ever been in, and brings back the paper crack.

We begin to pull. Papers litter the table. I'm all proud of myself as I've pulled a couple of $2 winners, even a $4. K pulls one or two winners as well. Then J says, "Oh my God."

What? What?

He just pulled a $599 pull tab.

Then K and I say "Oh my God." ARE YOU JOKING?!? He shows us. He wasn't joking.

No. Way.

We promptly started squealing, high-fiving, taking pictures, and calling and texting everyone we could think of. We could hardly believe it. What were the chances?

So I am now approximately $200 richer than I once was, and contemplating how best to spend my windfall. K got a massage. J is considering spending it on gas, which I hope I nipped in the bud. I mean, really. At least get gas for your boat, for Jah's sake. And me? Idunno as of yet. My mother suggested a new vacuum. I, of course, laughed.

Our day continued with a trip on the light rail in the rain, more food, more drink, and a game of Candyland. In Spanish.

It was a good day.

Scattershot

2008-05-31T23:04:00.003-05:00

Serious hail today - about the size of a 50 cent piece. Stripped the leaves off the trees. Quite a sight. And a sound. Wow.

Today's terribly amusing website: http://www.readatwork.com/. It has reading material like Dickinson's poetry and Twain's short stories set up in such a way to look like powerpoint presentations, so it's harder for you to get caught if you choose to spend your time on the job doing something more productive than actual work. Entertaining, at least.

Going to spend much of tomorrow at work. Bah.

Now to sleep; perchance to dream...

The Last Full Measure

2008-05-25T21:06:00.005-05:00

" We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm. " - George Orwell

Gettysburg Address - Abraham Lincoln

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation, so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

(More Lincoln Portrait stuff here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4165357)

Today didn't suck

2008-05-23T19:33:00.004-05:00

I'm a tiny bit crispy; just a little pink in the upper chest and the tops of my arms. Don't feel all that hot - sun, wind, scary Biffs, too much crappy food and a few adult libations will do that to you. But now I'm out of the sun, have had a chance to go to a real bathroom, and have a little of the pink stuff, so I'm feeling much better.

Some serious hard core adventures today. Get Out of Jail Free cards will get that for you.

I of course was late getting to J's house. I swear he said to turn left at Bill's... anyway, I was driving around and around and around - the whole thing was exactly like "Little Boxes". Except there was a tan one, and a tan one, and a tan one, and a tan one...

We ended up singing the song much of the day. It's a bit... insidious, I suppose one could say. Sticks with a person. Oh boy, does it.

Anyway, after multiple phone calls and stops for map viewing, I made it to J's little box and J and K and I left for breakfast. They hopped in my car and we drove downtown. My car - really, all cars - are just too small for J. And of course he accidentally hit the seat warmer on the way in and had a conniption fit. "Why the hell is my butt warm?!?" he roared. "How the hell do you turn it off?!?" K and I were laughing so hard we couldn't see, which isn't good when you're driving down the Interstate at 60. Man.

We met P at a cool little greasy spoon down on campus. The place is a riot. It's maybe the width of my bedroom, at best; something like 10 feet. Seriously. There's a long counter of about 14 stools, and the line forms behind the stools. There's barely room to breathe. It is not a place for the claustrophobic or the obese. Once someone finishes eating, the first person in line must somehow find space to scootch between the stools and the line in the back to the empty stool in question. You sit down to stare at a wall full of memorabilia, mainly money from various foreign countries, all dusty. The main cook is to the right, flipping pancakes and hashbrowns on the oldest equipment I believe I've ever seen still in use. He must have asbestos fingers. Turned a lot of stuff with the hands. Wow. And of course they do the stereotypical diner technique of yelling out orders and that they need more round plates and all that stuff. Any customer who breaks the many unwritten rules is yelled at as well. Much fun. And darned tasty food. I had blueberry pancakes and hashbrowns and was quite content. Oof.

For some bizarre reason, J and K got a bee in their bonnet that we needed to go down the road to some scary little joint that I suspect would be truly frightening at night. What drives anyone to drink their breakfast, I don't know. There were several older men in there doing just that. We didn't fit in, and I have to say I'm glad of it. But it was an experience. Getting there was craziness in itself - I was driving, had no idea where I was going, and J didn't have too many clues either. That led to one of the hands-down best lines of the day. He told me to take a right turn and then said "take the turn a little wide in case we need to abort." Nice.

We headed back to J's house to pick up the boat, the snackies, and the other important accoutrements to a day on the water.

Then, out to the lake. It's not a far drive in miles but it's a little amusing in the change of the people and the things. The lake has been the city person's and rich person's playground for over 100 years, and it shows. It's an interesting place. The lake is big and wandering, with lots of interconnected bays. The channels between the bays are often so narrow that there's bridges over them with roads and railroads crossing and crisscrossing. There're quite a few charter operations on the water, including the one with the local football team and the boat scandal of a year or two ago. We passed by that place, which was a nice moment. Some beautiful old historic steamboats and wooden motorboats, huge houses, rich folks and their toys.

We saw lots of funny things. One of the longer bridges had some entertaining graffiti: OPD Blows (heart) Seniors '08. And they signed it. That was smart. I'm sure the police department in question will never, never see it and never, never catch them. They're too wily. J loves to drive as fast as possible, then slows way down so we can just float and soak up the atmosphere. We played chicken with a couple geese at one point. We saw a boat floating mysteriously and appearing unoccupied... but we're pretty sure we know what was going on inside. We debated about going over and "asking if they needed help," but figured we'd likely see more than we really needed to see.

We also went to a couple of dockside establishments, the type where you can pull your boat up to a slip and go in to have one or two. They have parking attendants, so to speak, guys that come up and help you tie and untie your boat. Very posh. We saw several rich kids back from college, busily hitting on the waitresses. Oh, the humanity. We just wanted to smack so many of them. Honey, gotta tell you: you aren't as good looking as you think you are. Lots of women with fake tans and too many plastic surgeries wearing clothes that just screamed that they were searching for Husband #4. And then what had to be a first date with some woman and a guy who looked like Mike Ditka. He was so earnest, the poor guy. One wonders how it all came out.

So we went home early, really, by 6:30 or so, but we were just exhausted. All day in the sun will do that to you. We had a great time, though, and like I said, it didn't suck.

What a wonderful day.

Playing Monopoly

2008-05-21T20:26:00.004-05:00

I can't wait 'till Friday. Oh boy.

So my boss gave a few of us an exchange day for a massive project for which we put in a bunch of time back in February. In two lousy days, well 1 1/2 now, we're using our Get Out of Jail Free cards and blowing this popcorn stand.

(How many more metaphors can I mix in one sentence?)

The plan involves drinking, eating, and boating, not necessarily in that order. Friday is supposed to be 75 and sunny. Can we say hallelujah? So lunch today was spent watching deleted scenes from The Office and making a list of who is bringing what. I've got the honey peanut butter Cheerios thingies. Yum.

On the job scene, I'm still in a bit of a holding pattern, although it's not as bad as it was. I know I have a job now, at least; the 80% thing has been officially offered. Now it's just a matter of waiting 'till they determine if it can actually be full time. About once every two days there's a new scenario; most recent one is my job remains precisely the same. One can hope.

Just a note in the You Get What You Pay For department - don't buy $3.99 wine from Trader Joe's. I love Joe's for most things, but sometimes... *whew* I need to learn how to make vinegar.

Have also been determining summer plans. Have several work things plus a trip to OH to see a friend, so there's potential for some amusement. Only wish gas prices weren't so high. Jumped about 20 cents today. Also figured out I get a lousy 20 per gallon, on a good week. WTH? Should be more than that, with my car...

Yet another work update

2008-05-16T18:55:00.003-05:00

Holy crap, I tell you, it is Bee-you-tea-full out there. 79 degrees, sunny, a slight breeze. Just about perfect. Finally.

Big work thing yesterday that went quite well; better than pretty much all the participants thought it would. And it's over, so there's one less project for me to complete. Yay! Another big thing this weekend - a bit of a party, I suppose one could call it. Bought a dress for the event today at a new consignment shop - $16, baby. Yeah.

Side note: saw a guy today with the skyline of Minneapolis tattooed on the back of his forearm. Interesting choice.

As for work, I've been officially offered the 80% position. Unofficially, I might be full time. There's still hope. I'm a little nervous as I'm thinking that what I've been told is likely to happen won't - I suspect the person who told me what she's shooting for hasn't taken into account what other folks are likely to want. Ah well.

Today's amusement

2008-05-13T18:38:00.002-05:00

OK, this is pretty funny. And yes, I sucked.

http://www.televisiontunes.com/game.html

Was also fun to head to the home page and browse through the thousands of TV theme songs they have. I found M.A.S.H., Hill Street Blues, and The Office, of course, but also Antiques Roadshow, Masterpiece Theatre, Skippy the Bush Kangaroo, and Nova. How many of you remember the MST3K theme song from when it was on KTMA? Yes!

I love the Internet.

I'm still sick; not so pumped about that. Better, though. Likely will be better just in time to have my projects done and finally be able to take a day off work. Ah well.

SOTD

2008-05-10T21:41:00.004-05:00

Been a while since I listed a song of the day. I guess this means I need to spend more time watching You Tube and less time whining about my life. Anyway:

Rosie Thomas: I Let Myself Fall

Sorry about the JAM mash-up vid; least of evils (I could have given you a Gilmore Girls one, after all).

Hadn't heard of Thomas before but think I really like her stuff. Check out her Myspace for more listening loveliness. So far I like all I've heard. I like "Much Farther to Go" as well.

A good song makes every part of me alert, even while my whole body relaxes.

In the And Now For Something Completely Different category: The Gipsy Kings covering Hotel California. Absolute unadulterated coolness. Talk about guitar playing.

While on that subject, check out the Rosenberg Trio and their cover of Don't Mean A Thing. Lord. Well, and Bireli Lagrene, for that matter. Here's Minor Swing with all of 'em. And yes, it is pronounced MEE-nor. Get it together, wouldja?

And, of course, the Kings themselves:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebaYm65RC5Q

What Django does with only 2 fingers, for all practical purposes ... man.

I hate colds. That is all.

Opportunity Costs

2008-05-08T22:57:00.003-05:00

I'm dying, here.

I haven't yet seen this evening's episode of The Office. I can't read any fanfic, can't go on any message boards, can't do anything.

Granted, the trade-off was a good one - I ended up over at K's with T and H for dinner, drinks, conversation, and a viewing of Gone Baby Gone, which I hadn't seen. Darn fine flick. Been a while since I read the book as well - the book is incredible, terribly complex and terribly hard to read. Lehane's books are just wrenching. No good really comes out in the end, for anyone. Dark. Oh, so dark. But good.

Upshot of all this is, I'm too tired and too wound from the movie to watch my tape of The Office. So to bed for me. Dangit.

Did finish applying for my own job this afternoon. So that's done.

'Kay... really need to go to bed now.

After I find those Lehane books on my shelf. Now where did they go...

More Copious Whining

2008-05-07T20:01:00.004-05:00

So here's the latest.

Found out Tuesday, finally, that I was going to have the opportunity to apply for my own job, more or less, only at about 80% of the hours and therefore 80% of the salary. Yay!

(read that little exclamation as you will)

The application process includes such questions as what technology I'm comfortable with and uploading my resume, transcripts, and letters of recommendation. Don't we already have those on file? And my address and phone as well? *sigh* So it's an awful lot of busy work. Not so thrilled. But some job is better than no job, and that's where I once was.

Rumor has it that I might get really lucky and be offered 100%. It may be different than what I'm currently doing, but again, a job is a job. As long as the checks don't bounce and my rent can be paid and I can buy cat food.

But this whole going-on-three-months-of-terrifying-uncertainty thing is getting a wee bit old. This year has been hellish enough. Let's not add to it, shall we?

Escapism

2008-05-03T21:57:00.003-05:00

Saw Leatherheads tonight. Cute little thing. Have heard it described as George Clooney's love letter to the era and that's pretty well accurate, I think. The music is top notch - another Randy Newman score. It's beautifully lit, and has some very clever moments. And, well, George Clooney and John Krasinski? H.O.T. So that was a plus.

Also saw the trailer for the new Indy movie. Have been more than a little dubious, I admit it. But am starting to wonder if it really won't be that bad...

More stupid work talk, etc.

2008-05-02T16:21:00.010-05:00

Meetings all day today and the only thing I got out of it was sympathy. No solid word yet. Am pretty disgusted with the lack thereof, to tell the truth. Rather startling thing that came out at a staff meeting was that once they figure out what jobs are still left, they will be posted externally. WTF? This means we need to apply for our own jobs?!?!? We were told we'd be automatically given a position if one was available. Lovely. Just lovely. I am definitely starting to feel screwed over, and I can't say as I like it.

Been thinking more on how I can economize and what I need to live on. I hate this. I've been out of college how long now? How much hard work? How much job experience? I shouldn't have to think like this.

I'm not normally this cynical and depressing, I swear.

Today marks exactly ten years since the downfall of Lord Voldemort. That's just about the coolest thing in the universe. Yay for The Boy Who Lived.

Tonight went to a theatrical production, a company of six teen actors that wrote most of the play themselves in collaboration with a teaching artist. I was extremely impressed. For junior high kids, they were well spoken, funny, moved well, were self possessed, and just generally kicked some serious butt.

Friend of mine and I were chatting about this lovely economy and she said that the budget that she and her husband have for gas is higher than their student loan payments. Oh yeah, no, we're not in a recession.

HEY! ATTENTION ALL THOSE IN CHARGE OF THESE THINGS!

THIS IS NOT GOOD!

And how on earth do you think a federal gas tax vacation will help? That'll save what, 18.4 cents per gallon? Current average is $3.48 in my area. So now I'm paying what, $3.30 at best, assuming prices don't go up even more? Ooooo..... Dude, news flash here: Cub coupons will pick that up for you.

My car has a 16.5 gallon tank. I fill up about 3 times a month. Let's do a little math, shall we?

16.5 gallons x $3.48 per = $57.42 per fill up x 3 fill ups = $172.26 per month

(Jayzus. Shouldn't have done that math. The truth hurts. Yeowch.)

16.5 gallons x $3.30 per = $54.45 per fill up x 3 fill ups = $163.35 per month

That makes for a grand total saved of...
(drum roll, please)

$8.91

Now, I'm simplifying the math a tad as I don't go down to empty before I fill, so I actually spend a little less on gas. And $8.91 is $8.91. But really. It's like the tax rebate. What am I going to spend it on? Bills, of course. I'm not stupid.

How is that going to stimulate the economy?

ETA: Nice article in the Minnpost about it.

Holding pattern

2008-05-01T21:49:00.003-05:00

A few updates, in case you care:

Work thing this past weekend went exceedingly well. A good time was had by all. Much was learned, including the meaning of the terms isthmus and vibraphone. Lovely, lovely time. The boss even came to visit to specifically ask about things, which I thought was very nice of her. She does try to keep our spirits up.

Have day-long meetings tomorrow so hope to glean more gossip about the impending firings. Am currently in a holding pattern. Have gathered letters of recommendation and updated the resume. Now it's wait-and-see for another couple of weeks. Am not so pumped about doing work for next year right now - I'm basically doing work for nothing, or someone else's gain. Yay! Morale is low. Really low. But some volunteers came in over the weekend and completely redid the break room as they know how things have been. That's nice. Little things help.

Randomness for the day: OK, was wondering why I was hearing voices and didn't think it was my subconscious. Although these days that wouldn't surprise me. Turns out there's a coupla guys in the courtyard outside my office window throwing around a really cool light-up Frisbee. Nice.

News Flash: Life Not So Bad After All

2008-04-24T19:39:00.003-05:00

Today started crappily. Between the rain and cold, the early morning with little sleep, all the stuff I have to do, and my impending doom, I was not the happiest camper. Compounding my sorry state, The Issue got dredged up before the day was 45 minutes old and I was again explaining things with as little bitterness as I could manage to folks who didn't know the tale.

Thing is, I instantly had a good 20-25 people incensed on my behalf, to the point of bellering about starting petitions. They talked about how good I was at my job and how good I was for them specifically.

It was nice, and... well... sweet, really.

So I leave that little enclave, admittedly fairly close to teary, to go to onto my next mission of the day and I ran into my boss in the hall. We talked briefly about the big work thing I'm running over the weekend, and darned if she didn't wish me luck and give me a big hug.

*sigh*

Apparently I do some good in the world after all.

Bang on the drum all day

2008-04-23T22:12:00.005-05:00

Today, I was at work for 13 hours straight. Yay! And much fun was had by all.

You do see the sarcastic slant of my handwriting there, don't you?

Much of the time was spent answering questions and trading rumors about the upcoming reduction in force. The place is going to look like a ripped open anthill; a third of us dead and the rest all scurrying around in an unreasoning panic. It has not been a good day.

It has not been a good few weeks. I can't focus. I wonder why. And I can't make myself plan ahead and do work for too much in advance, I mean, what's the likely hood that all my planning is for naught? Pretty darn good, I'd say.

Although it was nice to hear several people say that they were sorry, the place wouldn't be the same without me, I'm an asset, thank me for my work, etc. Silver lining. Silver lining.

This weekend will be work-filled as well. Am in charge of a fairly massive undertaking from about 6:45 Saturday morning through 'til Monday night. That too will be fun as all heck - acting peppy through all this has not been my favorite. I generally am better at focusing on other things and just letting stuff go but that hasn't been happening recently.

Need to stop brooding and get to bed. Bah. Humbug. Need to read more comics and get myself in a better mood.

Conspicuous Consumerism

2008-04-22T19:47:00.004-05:00

I have way too many CDs.

Well, really I don't. But I do. But I don't.

I generally feel my CD collection is pitiful. Just pitiful. I have no Nepalese music in the stacks, for instance. Buddhist monks and Catholic monks chanting (2 separate disks, natch), folk music from Uganda, the Wisconsin Badger Marching Band, and the Minnesota Orchestra's recent recording of Beethoven 1, but nothing from Nepal. This may seem silly to most folks but it came back to haunt me at work today when I got caught a bit flat footed knowing nothing about music from Nepal. Long story.

(http://www.ccoder-usa.org/, if you must know)

Anyway, that was fairly fresh in my mind when in a fit of work avoidance this evening I decided to put my CDs in some semblance of order. Hence the "too many CDs!" "not enough CDs!" plaint. In the too many category: What a storage nightmare. Not enough shelf space so things are jammed in every which way and I can't see what I have. I ran across at least two CDs that I'd totally forgotten I own. They're sorted loosely by category, but with lack of space I can't do much more than that. ABC order might be even too anal for me, but I'm getting to that point.

But yet. No music from Nepal. One lousy CD from Australia. One! Only one CD of Japanese music as well, and it's orchestral - no folk music. I still don't own U2 Joshua Tree or Beatles Sergeant Pepper, which is a travesty. I mean, really.

CD thoughts remind me of a stand partner from long ago. Professional ensemble, but this was a young kid with much to learn. Much. OK, middle of rehearsal, swear to God:

"I have 200 CDs."

Really? Wow. Amazing. Now:

KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT DURING REHEARSAL, FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU, TWELVE?!?

He was annoying in many ways, but I really coulda smacked him after that one.

Freakin' phone was out much of yesterday which also meant no internet; drat you Qwest.

Random thing that has nothing to do with the previous (two) rant(s): My loud upstairs neighbors reached a new low today. Beautiful out there this evening (i.e. up above 60) so I opened my patio door to let in sun and air and let the cats smell smells and see sights.

Problem is, the neighbors thought the same way. They sent their two elephants disguised as small children out to their deck just above mine to go play. Lovely.

SQUEEEE! BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM SQUEEEEEEEEE! BOOM BOOM SQUEEEEEEEE!

Oh. My. God. Cats were looking at me like the world was going to come crashing in on us at any time and I was fairly certain they were right. The "BOOM BOOM BOOM" noise was familiar to me as that's the soundtrack to my life on a regular basis - I think they may be interior designers as they're continually doing something that sounds like moving furniture - but the "SQUEEEE!" is usually more muffled.

Almost makes me wish for cold weather again... but not quite...

Update for D...

2008-04-19T09:13:00.006-05:00

...who is likely the only person who reads this.

*grin*

Let's see... what's new around here? Just my typical social butterfly weekend: Am going out to dinner tonight to some new place with an old friend. That'll be fun. Tomorrow am heading to B&Cs new place for dinner and cards, not that I know where they live. Best get on that. Need to do some hard core cleaning as might have something for work at my house Monday night. Cat peed on my sweatshirt again, so I'm thinking the litter needs to be on the list.

Have big stuff for work next weekend and need to make sure I'm ready for that as well... it's one of those projects where I'm sure I've forgotten something and that's what's making me crazy - that I can't recall what I've forgotten.

Speaking of work, it's been a bit rough lately. A HUGE reduction in force is coming. My building alone is losing somewhere around 29%. I'm quite likely to be on that list. Can't say as I'm so pumped about that. Rumors are flying - got a call last night from a colleague who was pretty irate that she was told her job would be changing. Used quite colorful language. One hopes she'll be OK. One hopes we'll all be OK. But it's not going to happen. Best case scenario: I'll still be there and my job will change. Much more likely: do you want fries with that?

There's not a ton that can be done about it. We don't have as much money coming in, costs have to be cut. That's simple economics. What pisses me off is that my department seems to be getting hit the hardest. Hard to tell how much of that is perception and how much is The Truth. It's also a bit rough that I work my butt off, am good at my job, am well liked, my bosses want to keep me, but I am likely to get cut anyway. Seniority hurts sometimes.

Have been thinking on how to make economies myself. Smaller apartment, no garage, cut out internet, no home phone and just keep the cell. But I don't want to do any of that. Shop more at Goodwill and consignment, which I tend to do anyway. Car is almost paid for, which is nice. Had a haircut today - which costs and arm and two legs, every 6-8 weeks. My cosmetologist said to let her know, and she and I can talk about how we can make things cheaper. I promised her I'd never fall in with evil companions and go to Great Clips. She laughed and said she'd hunt me down if I did.

Funny how a tiny little thing like that can make me feel better.

Anyway. That's depressing. What else...

Changed my computer wallpaper to a picture of my cats. Can't "p" again. Need to replace this keyboard but am too cheap, especially now. They're changing the carpeting in the hallways of my apartment building so my whole apartment smells like glue. The cats are going to get high pretty soon, unless they are already - L is already attempting to modify my post with her attention to the mouse and the keyboard. Already deleted several sentences; yay for the inventor of "undo." Designed a card for the selling crafts stuff thing I've been toying with. Dunno how serious I am about any of this but it's an exercise. Don't like the look of them but not sure what's bugging me. They look amateurish. paper is decent; maybe it's how they're cut. Idunno.

Went to the big jugglefest last weekend and got closer to learning to juggle. That's just about the best people watching on earth. Anything that includes combat juggling and unicycle hockey is bound to be good. I even got up on a unicycle myself and with C's help managed to get at least a half turn of the wheel before I fell off. Good times. And J didn't knock himself in a particularly sensitive place so hard he fell over and curled into a fetal position, like what happened last time I went. Life is good.

Enough babbling for now, doncha think? I'd best pet the cat and distract her before things really get out of hand...

Chair Model

2008-04-17T20:48:00.001-05:00

Aaannnnddd... this is why I love The Office: episodes like tonight. Funny, romantic, sad, awkward, and pathetic, all in 22 minutes.

Sumer is a cumin in

2008-04-16T21:20:00.002-05:00

Went to a tiki bar today after work and...

Got. To. Sit. Outside.

Can you believe it?! Finally. FINALLY. The weather is nice enough to actually be outside for more than 30 seconds, and without a coat, too. Granted, we did bag it and go inside within an hour or two, but still.

And I am now the proud owner of a new tiki mug, whom we have christianed Mr. Smead. He's going in my office with the naked lady swizzle stick. A profitable evening.

Deregulation

2008-04-12T08:44:00.002-05:00

The whole thing with the FAA and the airlines and things not being inspected....

"It's all sort of ironic, when you think about it. When you fly, YOU are inspected quite thoroughly, whereas the plane itself is, perhaps, occasionally vacuumed. See, with this administration, if a passenger blows up a plane, it's a 'failure in the war on terror,' but if the plane just blows up on its own, it's 'the market self-regulating.' '' - Jon Stewart

Lightbulbs?!?

2008-03-25T21:55:00.004-05:00

Wow.

This woman is a lunatic and an embarrassment. I wouldn't believe this except, knowing her track record, it makes a sick kind of sense. With all the things in this world she could spend time - and taxpayer dollars - on, she chooses to fight the good fight about light bulbs. Light bulbs!

This of course begs a comment about her being a dim bulb herself, but I'll refrain.

Please, oh please, vote her out of office. Someone. Anyone.

http://www.startribune.com/politics/national/house/17002506.html?page=1&c=y

Bachmann is pro-choice on bulbs

By KEVIN DIAZ, Star Tribune

March 25, 2008

WASHINGTON - How many members of Congress does it take to change a light bulb? Americans may soon find out, courtesy of a contrarian piece of legislation introduced this month by Rep. Michele Bachmann of Minnesota.

Titled the "Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act," the bill seeks to repeal the nationwide phase-out of conventional light bulbs, the kind that have been used for more than a century -- pretty much since the invention of the incandescent light bulb.

Bachmann, a first-term Republican, is challenging the nation's embrace of energy-efficient compact fluorescent lights, saying the government has no business telling consumers what kind of light bulbs they can buy.

"This is an issue of science over fads and fashions," Bachmann said in an interview Tuesday.

"Congress tends to jump on whatever the current buzz is in the 24-hour news cycle, " Bachmann said.

Her bill, the first challenge of its kind, raises safety questions about the small amounts of mercury in fluorescent lights. It also lands her squarely in the middle of the debate over global warming. In recent remarks to a gathering of Sherburne County Republicans -- reported in the West Sherburne Tribune -- Bachmann called any human connection to global warming "voodoo, nonsense, hokum, a hoax."

"By 2012, incandescent light bulbs will be no more," Bachmann said. "Fluorescent bulbs are more polluting because of their mercury content. We are working on a light bulb bill. If the Democrats can hose up a light bulb, don't trust them with the country."

The electrical and manufacturing industries, in a rare alliance with environmentalists, portray Bachmann's mercury concerns as overblown. They argue that fluorescent lights actually reduce mercury emissions in the long run. That's because the new bulbs use so much less electricity, much of which is produced by burning coal, which emits greenhouse gases and mercury.

"That's not just the industry talking," said Mark Kohorst of the National Electrical Manufacturers Association. "That's an accepted aspect of these products, and that's why they've been promoted so heavily."

Whatever one's views on global warming, Kohorst said, the energy savings of fluorescent lights are real. "The lamp thing has merit," he said. "Unfortunately, [Bachmann] has lumped it in with this whole conspiracy thing."

Environmentalists are more emphatic in downplaying the mercury hazards of fluorescent bulbs, which they say are minimal.

"There is 200 times more mercury in each filling in Congresswoman Bachmann's teeth than there is in a compact fluorescent light bulb," said Julia Bovey, a spokeswoman for the Natural Resources Defense Council.

The federal government is also on board, with Congress' last energy bill, signed by President Bush in December, having mandated a phase-in to energy-saving bulbs starting in 2012.

But in a letter to congressional colleagues earlier this month, Bachmann asked for support of her legislation to reverse that mandate, unless a comptroller general report shows clear economic, health and environmental benefits from the switchover to fluorescent lights.

Her letter says that the energy bill "forces consumers and businesses to use only light bulbs chosen for them by the government" and that further study "is simple due diligence."

Mercury disposal an issue

The mercury content of fluorescent light bulbs has long been a concern of federal and state regulators. Minnesota is one of a handful of states that ban the disposal of fluorescent lights as general waste, and Xcel Energy, the state's biggest utility, actively reimburses many customers for recycling them.

The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) and Minnesota Pollution Control Agency (MPCA) outline a series of steps that homeowners should take to clean up broken fluorescent lights: Open windows, use rubber gloves, dispose of all material in sealed bags and remove it to a hazardous waste facility.

"It's almost as if you have to call the haz-mat team out to your home," Bachmann said.

Environmentalists argue that most of the steps are the same as cleanup from any broken glass accident, except for the special disposal requirements.

Industry experts say the amount of mercury in new compact fluorescent lights -- about 5 milligrams, on average -- is small but significant enough to warrant common-sense safety precautions and consumer recycling efforts to keep it out of landfills.

"There are minuscule amounts of mercury, but it's a hazardous waste, and we want to take it seriously," said Kim Sherman, product portfolio manager at Xcel Energy.

MPCA spokesman Sam Brungardt said the use of compact fluorescent lights, which use one-fourth the energy of regular bulbs, should certainly be encouraged. If new legislation is needed, he said, it should be to encourage consumers to recycle. "You have to make it easy to do this," he said.

Growing market

With or without the help of Congress, the market for compact fluorescent lights is growing. They are now more than 20 percent of the consumer market in the United States, up from 1 percent in 2001, according to Steve Rosenstock of the Edison Electric Institute.

"These bulbs use significantly less energy, so consumers can save lots of money by switching over," said Jason Mathers of the Environmental Defense Fund.

Fluorescent bulbs, however, cost several dollars more than regular household light bulbs, a factor that Congress failed to take into account when it passed its new mandate, Bachmann said.

For her, changing a light bulb should remain a matter of personal freedom.

"I was just outraged that Congress would want to substitute its judgment for the judgment of the American people," she said. "It struck me as a massive Big Brother intrusion into our homes and our lives."

Kevin Diaz • 202-408-2753

Happy Easter to all, and to all a good night.

2008-03-22T17:28:00.001-05:00

One of my all time favorite songs: The Vatican Rag

Dammit.

2008-03-20T16:31:00.000-05:00

http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/16853741.html

Minnesota novelist Jon Hassler dies

By SARAH T. WILLIAMS, Star Tribune

March 20, 2008

Beloved author Jon Hassler, whose unconquerable will to write became as much admired as his novels steeped in small-town Minnesota, died early Thursday of Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, a Parkinson’s-like disease. He was 74.

Hassler, of Minneapolis, battled PSP for almost 15 years, a disease that progressively stole his ability to write, to speak and, finally, to walk. But, fueled by the sheer force of will and the love and support of his wife, Gretchen Kresl Hasssler, Hassler devised ways to keep at it.

A spirited problem-solver, Hassler wrote his most recent few novels by “typing.” His fingers, however, would fall randomly on the keyboard, and only he could read the resulting “gibberish.” He’d translate the typewritten pages to Gretchen, who would then retype them.

“Through all this, I loved him for his courage and his pluck,” Gretchen Hassler said. “He just kept going and going. He had a book to finish, and, by golly, he finished it, too.”

A new novel, “Jay O’Malley,” was finished in the weeks before his death.

Hassler was born March 30, 1933, to Leo Blaise (a grocer) and Ellen (a teacher), of Staples, Minn. His career path took him from schoolteacher in Melrose to a regent’s professor at St. John’s University in Collegeville.

Along the way, he published more than 15 works of fiction for adults and young adults, including “Staggerford” (1977), “The Love Hunter (1981), “Grand Opening” (1987) and “The New Woman” (2005).

He is survived by sons David Hassler (Joyce), of Alexandria, and Michael Hassler, of Brainerd; daughter Elizabeth Hassler Caughey (Lonnie), of Brainerd; stepdaughters Catherine Cich (Geoff), of Robbinsdale; Elizabeth Seymour (Chris), of Richfield; stepson Emil Kresl, of Austin, Texas. and five grandchildren.

Sarah T. Williams • 612-673-7951

A Three Hour Tour

2008-03-19T23:41:00.002-05:00

Geez, but I'm tired.

As a civilian, I kind of like Holy Week. As a musician, I can't stand it.

Am on hour 18 since getting up. Been one of those days that you run from the minute you leave bed. Got back about an hour ago from a three hour rehearsal for the church gigs I have for the whole Triduum. Three hours. This is on top of the regular work day, plus the weekly guitar lesson. And I've been up for the past hour since I got home sorting through the music folder for the three days and trying to figure out what the heck is going on. Not my favorite.

(Side note - a blog post from my cat: 52222222222222222222222222222223)

And I have to work again tomorrow - the alarm is ringing at 5:15, same as always. So I'm going to have another glass of wine and hit the hay.

Most people like holidays. Musicians learn early on to hate December and March - or April - whenever Easter is.

There goes the neighborhood

2008-03-16T20:15:00.002-05:00

In oddities for today, was noodling around reading the news online and saw the headline for an article I figured I should read - two candidates vying for the Democratic endorsement for an open House seat. So one of the guys looked a little familiar... turns out he graduated from my high school. But I didn't know the name, and we were enough apart according to his age that we weren't there at the same time. So why did he look familiar? I went to his web site, read his bio, and the description of where he lives matches my area. Hm. I went back to the article. Another candidate is quoted mentioning he lives in an apartment. Double hm. I couldn't stand it. I went to Anywho.

Darned if he doesn't live in the building right across the courtyard from me.

So is this a good or a bad thing?

Welcom to Teh Holiez Bibul

2008-03-13T16:34:00.004-05:00

This has to be fairly close to the funniest thing I've ever seen online: LOLCat Bible Translation Project

It's the entire Judeo-Christian Bible, translated into lolcat speak. Srsly. Don't read if you're easily offended.

But then, if you're easily offended, what the heck are you doing reading this blog?

Linkage a-go-go

2008-03-11T20:35:00.004-05:00

This has got to be about one of the funniest darn websites I've seen in a long time: Garfield Minus Garfield. It takes standard Garfield comic strips and removes the title character, making for these odd existential comments on modern life. I truthfully haven't had much use for Garfield for years now, although I really liked the strip at first, but these lend a whole new meaning; make the strip entertaining again.

Ran into the site through a new favorite: MinnPost. MinnPost is a new online only newspaper that conveniently hired many of the castoffs of the local papers, the ones more-or-less forced into retirement to save money, the ones who are smart, knowledgeable, really can write. There's a fair amount of thought in the articles, which is what I like. Besides having Uncle Al, whom I have loved for years, the paper can claim John Camp, more commonly known as novelist John Sanford. Camp wrote a series of pieces from Iraq, which are quite good.

Went out tonight with T and S. Idiot me forgot until S called me; thank goodness she did. We're planning on going out once a month. As they're two of my oldest friends, I'm glad we're making the effort.

Darn tired now, though. Daylight savings or something... I just can't get it together...

Idiots in Sports

2008-02-17T17:59:00.003-06:00

Anybody who knows me can tell you I'm no more a sports geek than I am a gamer. I grasp neither concept, really. But I did manage to run into the sports blog:

http://www.firejoemorgan.com/

Oh my.

What's likely my favorite recent post encapsulates quite well why I don't really care for football or anything else other than baseball, really: idiots. And I quote...

Sunday, February 10, 2008

This Might Be Dangerous

On a slow Sunday, Vikes' fullback Tony Richardson talks about his long-term plans:

"I don't want to move at this point in my career. I had a good meeting with the owners. I've got some gas left in the wheel and want to keep playing."

One assumes there is a corresponding tread in his tank. Both problems should be fixed post haste.

posted by Ken Tremendous # 12:56 PM

2008-02-15T09:21:00.002-06:00

There's been yet another school shooting. Seven dead as of this morning.

I think that the most depressing thing might be how little news coverage it's getting. We're getting used to this type of tragedy; immune, somehow. It gets talked about briefly during newscasts, we see film of people on stretchers, loaded into ambulances, huddled together in shock, then go on to something else. Last night, Nightline led with the story, but promptly went on to a fluff piece for Valentine's Day about two married police officers in San Francisco. I seem to recall there was yet something else on after that, but I got irritated and turned it off. The other newscasts I saw last night were the same. Most didn't even lead with the story.

What does this say about us?

2008-01-15T20:44:00.000-06:00

I dunno, maybe it's cause I'm so stressed. But this song makes me cry every time. Every single one.

Song of the day: Death Cab for Cutie, "I Will Follow You Into the Dark".

2008-01-05T19:43:00.000-06:00

Schoolsville - Billy Collins

Glancing over my shoulder at the past,
I realize the number of students I have taught
is enough to populate a small town.

I can see it nestled in a paper landscape,
chalk dust flurrying down in winter,
nights dark as a blackboard.

The population ages but never graduates.
On hot afternoons they sweat the final in the park
and when it's cold they shiver around stoves
reading disorganized essays out loud.
A bell rings on the hour and everybody zigzags
into the streets with their books.

I forgot all their last names first and their
first names last in alphabetical order.
But the boy who always had his hand up
is an alderman and owns the haberdashery.
The girl who signed her papers in lipstick
leans against the drugstore, smoking,
brushing her hair like a machine.

Their grades are sewn into their clothes
like references to Hawthorne.
The A's stroll along with other A's.
The D's honk whenever they pass another D.

All the creative-writing students recline
on the courthouse lawn and play the lute.
Wherever they go, they form a big circle.

Needless to say, I am the mayor.
I live in the white colonial at Maple and Main.
I rarely leave the house. The car deflates
in the driveway. Vines twirl around the porch swing.

Once in a while a student knocks on the door
with a term paper fifteen years late
or a question about Yeats or double-spacing.
And sometimes one will appear in a windowpane
to watch me lecturing the wallpaper,
quizzing the chandelier, reprimanding the air.

Included in the book, Sailing Around the Room: New and Selected Poems.

Included in the book, The Apple That Astonished Paris .

New Year music

2007-12-31T09:40:00.001-06:00

Happy last day of 2007.

It's snowing again.

We've had... I dunno... maybe 17 inches so far this December. That's close to normal, but less than the past few years. I somehow think maybe I've forgotten how pretty it is when there's fresh snow, when there's snow all the time. It just keeps coming and coming. Instead of getting all depressed about it, I'm enjoying sitting here, staring out at the big puffy flakes as they drift down to join their mates.

Songs of the day, or rather song versions of the day:
Fields of Gold
Time After Time
Somewhere Over the Rainbow
What a Wonderful World

These are all Eva Cassidy's versions. Just lovely. That woman had some serious pipes. Really serious. Damn.

Here's some stuff from Nightline about her:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

More in the Songs of the Day category - the Minnesota Orchestra's versions of the Beethoven symphonies. I've heard and/or performed these things... I don't even know how many times. But these recordings are different. Non-musicians, and even some musicians, may wonder why on earth we need yet another recording of any of these. Non-musicians don't always get what any good classical musician knows immediately: there ain't ever going to be two interpretations that are exactly the same. I don't even know how many versions I own of the Bach 'Cello Suites, for example. So new versions of old pieces can be great. But just like any remake, you have to ask yourself - is it worth it? Is there anything new being said? I hate note for note, exact interpretation remakes. What's the point then? Studio time is expensive, and for an orchestra, out of this world (see the Mpls St Paul mag article below for deets). So do we really need another recording of the Beethoven symphonies? Oh yes. This one... mmm... I just purchased the 1 and 6 one, which is brand-new; don't yet own the others that have been released (4-5, 3-8, 9).

Nice stuff. Really nice stuff. Osmo has a tendency with his musical interpretations to stick close to the score. He has a reputation as a perfectionist and taskmaster. He pushes his musicians. Hard. Thing is, they like him, and they work for him, and you can really tell. It's hard to play softly well. It really is; much harder than louds. The piano quality the Minnesota Orchestra is achieving these days... really masterful. Unbelievable. I haven't been fortunate enough to hear a ton of world class orchestras live, but these days I think Minnesota is up there with the best of them. There's a just flat out LIFE to this recording I can't remember hearing from others. These people aren't going through the motions. They're laying it all out on the line with all they've got. I noticed things I never noticed before. Amazing.

Brief historical info
MN Orch Archives and pictures
Mpls St. Paul Magazine article
St. Paul Pioneer Press article
MPR Article - "Does the world really need another Beethoven's Fifth?"

2007-12-24T23:18:00.000-06:00

A Christmas Carol
Charles Dickens, 1843

I have endeavoured in this Ghostly little book, to raise the Ghost of an Idea, which shall not put my readers out of humour with themselves, with each other, with the season, or with me. May it haunt their houses pleasantly, and no one wish to lay it.

Their faithful Friend and Servant,
C. D.
December, 1843.

Marley was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. The register of his burial was signed by the clergyman, the clerk, the undertaker, and the chief mourner. Scrooge signed it: and Scrooge's name was good upon 'Change, for anything he chose to put his hand to. Old Marley was as dead as a door-nail.

Mind! I don't mean to say that I know, of my own knowledge, what there is particularly dead about a door-nail. I might have been inclined, myself, to regard a coffin-nail as the deadest piece of ironmongery in the trade. But the wisdom of our ancestors is in the simile; and my unhallowed hands shall not disturb it, or the Country's done for. You will therefore permit me to repeat, emphatically, that Marley was as dead as a door-nail.

Scrooge knew he was dead? Of course he did. How could it be otherwise? Scrooge and he were partners for I don't know how many years. Scrooge was his sole executor, his sole administrator, his sole assign, his sole residuary legatee, his sole friend and sole mourner. And even Scrooge was not so dreadfully cut up by the sad event, but that he was an excellent man of business on the very day of the funeral, and solemnised it with an undoubted bargain.

The mention of Marley's funeral brings me back to the point I started from. There is no doubt that Marley was dead. This must be distinctly understood, or nothing wonderful can come of the story I am going to relate. If we were not perfectly convinced that Hamlet's Father died before the play began, there would be nothing more remarkable in his taking a stroll at night, in an easterly wind, upon his own ramparts, than there would be in any other middle-aged gentleman rashly turning out after dark in a breezy spot -- say Saint Paul's Churchyard for instance -- literally to astonish his son's weak mind.

.........

2007-12-24T23:15:00.000-06:00

A Cup of Christmas Tea
Tom Hegg, 1981

The log was in the fireplace,
all spiced and set to burn.
At last the yearly Christmas race
was in the clubhouse turn.
The cards were in the mail,
all the gifts beneath the tree.
And 30 days reprieve till VISA
could catch up with me.

Though smug satisfaction
seemed the order of the day,
Something still was nagging me
and would not go away.

A week before, I got a letter
from my old great Aunt.
It read: Of course I'll understand
completely if you can't,
But if you find you have some time
how wonderful if we
Could have a little chat and share
a cup of Christmas tea.

She'd had a mild stroke that year
which crippled her left side.
Though house bound now,
my folks had said
it hadn't hurt her pride.
They said: She'd love to see you.
What a nice thing it would be
For you to go and maybe have
a cup of Christmas tea.

But boy! I didn't want to go.
Oh, what a bitter pill,
To see an old relation and
how far she'd gone downhill.
I remembered her as vigorous,
as funny and as bright.
I remembered Christmas Eves when
she regaled us half the night.

I didn't want to risk all that.
I didn't want the pain.
I didn't need to be depressed.
I didn't need the strain.

And what about my brother?
Why not him? She's his aunt, too!
I thought I had it justified,
but then before I knew,
The reasons not to go I so
painstakingly had built
Were cracking wide and crumbling
in an acid rain of guilt.

I put on boots and gloves and cap,
shame stinging every pore.
And armed with squeegee,
sand and map,
I went out my front door.
I drove in from the suburbs
to the older part of town.
The pastels of the newer homes
gave way to gray and brown.

I had that disembodied feeling
as the car pulled up and stopped
Beside the wooden house
that held the Christmas cup.
How I got up to her door
I really couldn't tell...
I watched my hand rise up and press
the button of the bell.

I waited, aided by my nervous
rocking to and fro.
And just as I was thinking
I should turn around and go,
I heard the rattle of the china
in the hutch against the wall.
The triple beat of two feet
and a crutch came down the hall.

The clicking of the door latch
and the sliding of the bolt,
And a little swollen struggle
popped it open with a jolt.
She stood there pale and tiny,
looking fragile as an egg.
I forced myself from staring
at the brace that held her leg.

And though her thick bifocals
seemed to crack and spread her eyes,
Their milky and refracted depths
lit up with young surprise.
Come in! Come in!
She laughed the words.
She took me by the hand.
And all my fears dissolved away
as if by her command.

We went inside and then before
I knew how to react
Before my eyes and ears and nose
was Christmas past, alive, intact!

The scent of candied oranges,
of cinnamon and pine,
The antique wooden soldiers
in their military line,
The porcelain Nativity
I'd always loved so much,
The Dresden and the crystal
I'd been told I mustn't touch.

My spirit fairly bolted
like a child out of class
And danced among the ornaments
of calico and glass.
Like magic I was six again,
deep in a Christmas spell.
Steeped in the million memories
That the boy inside knew well.

And here among old Christmas cards
so lovingly displayed,
A special place of honor
for the ones we kids had made.
And there, beside her rocking chair,
the center of it all,
My great Aunt stood and said how nice
it was I'd come to call.

I sat and rattled on about
the weather and the flu.
She listened very patiently
then smiled and said, "What's new?"
Thoughts and words began to flow.
I started making sense.
I lost the phony breeziness
I use when I get tense.

She was still passionately interested
in everything I did.
She was positive. Encouraging.
Like when I was a kid.
Simple generalities
still sent her into fits.
She demanded the specifics.
The particulars. The bits.

We talked about the limitations
that she'd had to face.
She spoke with utter candor
and with humor and good grace.
Then defying the reality
of crutch and straightened knee,
On wings of hospitality
she flew to brew the tea.

I sat alone with feelings that
I hadn't felt in years.
I looked around at Christmas
through a thick hot blur of tears.
And the candles and the holly
she'd arranged on every shelf,
The impossibly good cookies
she still somehow baked herself.

But these rich and tactile memories
became quite pale and thin,
When measured by the Christmas
my great Aunt kept deep within.
Her body halved and nearly spent,
but my great Aunt was whole.
I saw a Christmas miracle,
the triumph of a soul.

The triple beat of two feet and a
crutch came down the hall,
The rattle of the china
in the hutch against the wall.
She poured two cups. She smiled and then she handed one to me.
And then we settled back and had
a cup of Christmas tea.

2007-12-24T23:10:00.000-06:00

A Visit From St. Nicholas
Clement Clarke Moore, 1822

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads.
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

“Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid! on, on Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys, and St Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of Toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler, just opening his pack.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly!

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself!
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

2007-12-22T15:07:00.000-06:00

Jesu, joy of mans' desiring.

Or, to quote a favorite former physics teacher, I'll be dipped in poop.

I just through one thing and the other managed to run into an ex-boyfriend online. It's a bit of a long story involving idle curiosity combined with reading too many books combined with the wonder that is the Internet.

In other words, I managed to discover today that in the 14-15 years since I finally dumped this particular ex-boyfriend, he's gone from working in a dead-end job in a small grocery store in a college town in the Midwest to being a dive instructor in Grand Cayman.

WTF?

If nothing else, this proves how easy it is to find someone online. It's not like I looked that hard, or have that much knowledge about where to look. Google, combined with hits on a message board he posts on, combined with my memory and brain power put things together. A little scary, thinking about it further, about how a stalker could easily find a person if they knew a little bit about them to begin with. Makes me a bit afraid of message boards. And blogging, for that matter.

*waves at all my exes*

It also proves a bit about how, although my friends were too nice to say it to me at the time, I should have ditched him long before I did. He was a decent person and all, but we were never a good match and I was slow to see it. But really. Talk about divergent life paths. And what can happen in a relatively short period of time.

I'm glad for him, truthfully. He was on a path to nowhere in particular, last I knew. Smart, with a bachelor's degree, but down in the dumps because he couldn't get into grad school and couldn't get a decent job in his field with no grad degree. He had no sense of, to use a music term, directed motion. So he was a stockboy. Whose hobby - and passion - was sailing. Hence the connection. Good for him for finding a direction and reinventing himself. Most of my exes, with an exception or two, headed straight for Loserville.

*evil grin*

In other news, the cat is currently licking my leg to the point that my pants have a spot that's soaked. I'm not entirely certain why, and I'm a little afraid of whatever the answer might be. I need to change their litter box at some point today, which is hopefully unrelated. They've been so much trouble lately that it's like I have 10 cats. Constantly underfoot and in my face. I haven't been home much, which I'm thinking is part of it.

However:

I have a week off. This makes me want to sing, rumba, Charleston, and tango. Today, I did little other than to revel in the fact that I don't have to go to work for another nine days. Ten, including today. Mmmm....

The cats have also provided me with a built in excuse for not exercising - like I actually need one. Dug out the resistance bands today and one was promptly stolen such that it could be dragged around the house, a bit like a kitten; although hopefully a kitten would not be dropped, batted around, chewed, and then picked up again for a repeat performance.

I have to do Christmas Eve dinner, plus am bringing the stuff for our particular branch of the fam to Christmas itself. Am also going to a concert tomorrow night. Somewhere. Am not done with my Christmas shopping, my cards, or anything else, really. Might want to get on that.

This is apropos of absolutely nothing, but I found a website today I must share: the T. Herman Zweibel Memorial Foundation. My favorite part, I think, is from The Life and Timeline of T. Herman Zweibel:

1885: Ulysses S. Grant dies and, after an elaborate funeral procession through the streets of New York, is buried in an unmarked grave; today, the exact location of his remains is unknown.

And that, right there, is why I have always loved The Onion; since college when they were headquartered across the street from my dorm. It always gives me some reason to chuckle evilly.

Last night went out with friends and colleagues. Was mostly very fun as got to hang out with some people I hadn't seen in quite a while. Stayed out longer than I meant to as there ended up being some drama towards the end of the evening and I wanted to make sure everyone made it home OK. I finally couldn't take the drama any more and had to leave. Why, oh why, are men so stupid? Blind, really, especially while having had WAY too much to drink. But then, the corollary to that is why are women so stupid that they actually listen to them. *sigh* T and I commented to each other at one point amongst the awkwardness that we were the only two normal people there. Not coincidentally, we were also the only two who were sober.

*double sigh*

Hopefully all will be well. At least eventually.

OK, this is plenty long for one post, and it's taken me all day, and I'm tired. Off to bed.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

ETA: This is my 50th post. Huh.

2007-12-10T20:07:00.000-06:00

My concerts are done. I could sing.

OK, that's an exaggeration. One more. And then I'm done. I can hardly wait.

Normal people don't get how much December sucks for musicians. We're constantly on the run. I'm just tired in general of being stressed. And tired. And cold, come to that. But it's been that kind of year. I'm in a lull between major projects. Things should get truly hideous right around the first of the year, lull again in early April, then suck through to June. Or something like that. The writers' strike is killing me. It would be nice to be able to watch decent - for lack of a better word - TV to relax. But no. We get such crapola as Gladiator. Who thinks of this junk? And PBS, as much as I love them, is in the middle of a fund drive. So the Roadshow and This Old House get preempted for the likes of stinkin' Andre Rieu, who I hate. *sigh* When you can't count on PBS, you can't count on nobody.

Anyway, concerts are almost done, shopping is almost done, wrapping is almost done, decorating is almost done, baking is almost done... huzzah. Cards need to occur. But it could be a whole lot worse. That aspect of stress at least is under control.

Tomorrow will be a relatively easy day at work. Most of my projects should involve sitting on my derrière and listening to other folks. Little thought or preparation involved for me. Hallelujah. My brain is starting to shut down. OK, wrong tense there. But you know. Going to have a review on Thursday, so need to prepare for that. But shouldn't be too bad.

And then there's today's puzzler: why do the cats, who have a perfectly good water bowl mind you, insist upon drinking from the humidifier basin whenever I take out the tank to refill it? Not to mention the little one, who persists in ripping my Santa window cling down so she can chew on it. Not making me happy. At least they haven't knocked the mini tree over in a few days. And they haven't ripped down any of the Christmas lights. Granted, December is still young.

OK, 9 p.m. and therefore time for bed. I don't get to bed by 9, I regret it the next day. Granted, I've been yawning since 6. Oh adventure, be my wild partner.

Song of the week: Coffee Shop. Yes, I know it's in a commercial. In spite of that, it's lovely. Sorry to not be able to link to the real vid - this was the best I could find on You Tube. I think I like his other stuff too. His music isn't deep, but it's decent. For what I've heard, Coffee Shop is my fave.

2007-11-11T12:43:00.000-06:00

In Flanders Fields
Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918)
Canadian Army

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

2007-11-05T21:57:00.000-06:00

Not much to say; just figured I may as well say something as it's been a while.

Not so pumped about the TV writers' strike. Moonlighting had to deal with the last big one, back in '88. It's not a federal case or anything, and Lord knows there's plenty in this world that's more important, but it's nice to have an escape, once and a while. And Jim and Pam finally got together. Darn it!

Today traded places with one of my co-workers and did his job for the day. What fun. Things are totally different where he works. Everyone was very nice, helpful, welcoming, willing to try anything. Just different. Had a great time.

Am tired but just can't make myself go to bed. Hm.

Spent time cleaning today, some stuff that has been sitting around gathering dust for quite some time. Hung up piles of clean clothes, made the bed, etc.

Got a book the other day - Country Wisdom and Know-How: Everything You Need to Know to Live Off the Land. Stinkin' awesome. Covers everything from how to build a chicken coop to cooking with tofu to chair caning and seat weaving. You can't go wrong with that.

Went out with T yesterday to Penzey's, lunch, and a yarn shop that is unfortunately closing. We had a good time. Got some sock yarn. Think I'm going to try to crochet some socks. Have been crafty lately. This weekend did some canning, crocheting, soap making.

I can't "p" again. Stupid keyboard.

2007-10-23T19:25:00.000-05:00

So I walked in the door after work today, Jimmy John's in hand, to find the radio on. Hmm. Could have sworn I'd turned it off. What the heck...

Oh Lord.

Turns out, somebody who shall remain nameless (my money is on the Littler of the two Sh!t Sisters pictured in the heading of this blog.) decided to dig for China in the plant limping along on the buffet next to the radio.

Dirt and plant bits everywhere, the water bowl contents turned to mud. I hope they were thirsty while I was gone, darn it.

And of course by the time I get home the deed is done and it's too late to yell at anyone. You have to strike when the iron is hot, and they'd both long forgotten when I finally saw the evidence. *sigh*

I've just been cranky lately. I swear everything is going to hell. I've sent out enough sympathy cards in the last few weeks that I should have bought stock in Hallmark, work is insane to the point that I'm spending only two extra hours a day there on a good day, and I'm so late doing more work at home I'm not getting any sleep. When I do finally get to bed I'm too wound up to relax. I'm thinking about all I have to do.

And that one letter on my keyboard? It's not working again, at least not consistently. I can no longer say things about Peeves the Poltergeist.

OK, now it's working. WTH?

'Kay, rant done. Time for bed. Shout out to any of you in Cali who may be reading this. Stay safe.

"One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important." ~Bertrand Russell

“Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet”

“Stress: The confusion created when one's mind overrides the body's basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it”

2007-10-21T16:06:00.000-05:00

Went to what should have been an excellent concert last night: Strauss Metamorphosen and Beethoven 4. It mostly was an excellent concert, really. Except for That Woman.

In this particular hall there's a tier of seats that goes up and around the main floor, doing a 360 including behind the stage. It lends an interesting perspective for those who want to get up to see the conductor from much the same angle as the orchestra. Problem was, some idiot was up in the area behind the stage and insisted on taking pictures for most of the Beethoven. So the $%^&@! orange blinking light of her camera was flashing out at pretty much the entire audience. I could cheerfully have thrown her off the balcony. As could the rest of the audience. You could hear the undercurrent of grumblings every time she lifted that devil device and at least three people got up to talk to the usher nearest me in an attempt to get someone, anyone, to go find that woman and make her stop.

Unfortunately, no one did.

She would take a picture, turn to the woman next to her to look at the digital display, raise the camera, take another picture, scoot along the bench to find a different angle, raise the camera, take another picture... This has hands-down got to be the rudest behavior I've ever seen exhibited at a concert, and that includes people reading the paper, watch alarms going off, and cell phones bleeping. And I'm way past losing track of the number of concerts I've been to.

I don't know what the heck was in the minds of the usher corps, but I'm thinking not a single person in the audience would have called the cops if we happened to notice That Woman having a quiet accident. We'd have applauded.

Hey lady - if by some strange chance you're reading this, do us all a favor and stay home until you learn how to behave in public.

Soul Renewal and Robert Frost

2007-10-20T16:28:00.003-05:00

Soul Renewal

It's the first sunny day in weeks. I've almost forgotten the color of a truly blue sky. I decide to make the 4 mile walk to the lake and back. Who knows when a day this nice will come again.

There's a million people out. We know and appreciate the rarity of a nice day, here in October in the Midwest. It's been so rainy lately; the sky lowering all the time. But somehow, no one is talking. It's like we all agree on the value of nothingness, of just being.

It's warm enough for shorts and t-shirts, another rarity in October.

The sound of the bike gears catching as the old man passes me, bright blue bike helmet and backpack on, wearing reflectors on his arms and legs even though it is the middle of a sunny day. He struggles his way up the hill. I am almost pacing him. Then the hill crests and his pace increases. He continues on without me, blazing a trail for me to follow.

Black ducks almost as far as I could see, taking a break for a rest and a drink before continuing their southward journey.

A sailboat catching the stiff breeze passes a fishing boat steaming out hopefully towards a possible walleye feast.

A stream giggling it's way towards the lake.

The woman wearing an iPod on one hip and her cell phone in the opposite ear, chattering away. The only possible conclusion is that she must be clinically insane.

The only sounds the wind as it rustles past my ears, through the leaves still clutching to the tree that is their summer home.

Scuffling through the fallen leaves to hear them crackle and crunch.

I'm almost home when I feel my shoulders drop into the place designed for them; I tend to forget that my habitual clench is not natural.

I wish this would last, but fall is inherently ephemeral. That may be the real reason for it's beauty.

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

2007-10-07T20:36:00.000-05:00

Had some excitement at church this morning. Was out in the gathering space (fancy name for huge foyer area) checking to make sure the volume was up high enough so people out there could hear when I heard this beep...beep...beep...

Hmm.

Grabbed my father. Dragged him out there. Asked him if he heard it too.

He listened for a bit... yes, yes he did.

Uh oh.

So we went trucking towards the source of the sound, which seemed to be coming from the part of the church that opens up into the Hall (area for wedding receptions, chicken dinners, bingo and the like). It kept getting louder. Beep... BEEP... BEEP! We grabbed the music director on the way, as she was walking by and has keys for everything. The sound kept getting louder as we three headed towards the school. Was that the fire alarm? Was the school on fire? Were we going to have to evacuate a good 1500 people in the church?

We got through the last door into the school and found adults leading what looked like 1st graders out the door. Just a drill, they said.

Just a drill? What the heck were they thinking, just a drill? Could it have occurred to them to warn us that they'd be conducting a fire drill during church? Could they maybe have bumped the thing back a lousy 30 minutes to avoid all this in the first place? I could have strangled somebody. Who knows what sort of panic that could have set off. Think, people, think. *sigh*

Although in hindsight, it's a little scary that the gathering space was full of people who didn't want to be in the main sanctuary for some reason (small children and the like) and no one came in to tell any of us about the alarm.

When you usher in a large parish, you get used to things happening. We haven't had somebody go down in a few weeks, but we're always prepared to have to call the local Finest to come out and save the day. We have EMTs come to visit several times a year. Fainting is the most common, but we've also had diabetic reactions and heart issues.

Scariest one ever (that I had anything to do with) was the poor Mexican woman who had come to church in a vain search for comfort... she couldn't reach her sick father in Mexico by telephone and was terrified he had died... she kept banging her head against the wall and asking God to take her instead of her father...

2007-09-30T19:51:00.000-05:00

Song of the Day: "Out Of My League" by Stephen Speaks

it's her hair and her eyes today
that just simply take me away
and the feeling that i'm falling further in love
makes me shiver but in a good way
all the times i have sat and stared
as she thoughtfully thumbs through her hair
and she purses her lips, bats her eyes as she plays,
with me sitting there slack-jawed and nothing to say

coz i love her with all that i am
and my voice shakes along with my hands
coz she’s all that I see and she’s all that I need
and i'm out of my league once again

it's a masterful melody when she calls out my name to me
as the world spins around her she laughs, rolls her eyes
and i feel like i'm falling but it's no surprise

coz i love her with all that i am
and my voice shakes along with my hands
cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea
but i'd rather be here than on land
yes she's all that i see and she's all that i need
and i'm out of my league once again

it's her hair and her eyes today
that just simply take me away
and the feeling that i'm falling further in love
makes me shiver but in a good way
all the times i have sat and stared
as she thoughtfully thumbs through her hair
and she purses her lips, bats her eyes as she plays,
with me sitting there slack-jawed and nothing to say

coz i love her with all that i am
and my voice shakes along with my hands
cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea
but i'd rather be here than on land
yes she's all that i see and she's all that i need
and i'm out of my league once again

2007-09-26T19:22:00.000-05:00

"There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong!"
-Mort Sahl

2007-09-25T18:48:00.000-05:00

Darn that Ken Burns and curse PBS. I should know better than to watch that station. I get sucked into a program and then before I know it I've lost a week. Happens every time. The music is particularly good; generally Burns sticks with folk and popular music of the time but this time he included some classical stuff including the Faure Elegy and I think I might have heard Beethoven 7 at some point. As usual from Burns, incredible work.

Gotta go now - 3rd installment on any minute now.

"Personally, I feel that some such setback as that -- tragic though it was for many Americans, for whom it would always be too late -- was not entirely a bad thing. It was all right to have a good opinion of ourselves, but we Americans were so smug with our cockiness. We somehow felt that just because we were Americans we could whip our weight in wildcats. And we had got it into our heads that production alone would win the war."
-Ernie Pyle on the disasters in North Africa

2007-09-17T19:39:00.000-05:00

Nothing much to say; just wanted to say a few words.

Nitwit. Blubber. Oddment. Tweak.

Thank you.

2007-09-06T21:21:00.000-05:00

OH my God.

Oh MY God.

Oh my GOD.

OH. MY. GOD!!!

OK, so I have a really good story.

I got home from work after another long day determined to get some tasks done around here that have been much put off. I got to the grocery store, put dishes in the dishwasher, and prepared to finally do my laundry.

Some context: I'd noticed my bedroom had been... well... a little smelly for the past couple of days. My first thought was the cats had left me a present, as they sometimes do in protest at the state of their litter box. I rooted around a little bit, but nothing was out in the open and I didn't have time to search too hard - haven't been home much this week due to work. Still no sign of why it smelled... hmm... maybe it's the laundry?

So last night, I sniffed the basket.

OK, it's the laundry. Not good.

I figured I must have put a wet washcloth in there or something and it had migrated towards the bottom and started to get a little ripe. Obviously a sign that I need to get moving and get this washing clothes thing taken care of.

So I got home from the grocery store, sorted my piles, and brought them down to the laundry room.

I washed. Hmm... do I still smell something, or am I imagining things?

I dried. I opened the dryer. I smelled...

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!!

THERE'S A DEAD MOUSE! IN THE DRYER! IN MY LAUNDRY! A MOUSE! DEAD! LAUNDRY! DEAD! MOUSE!

OH MY GOD!

So I went back to my apartment, saying "Oh my God!" the entire way down the hall, in an attempt to find something to pick the mouse up with. The clean mouse, being I'd washed and dried it. Good Lord. I got paper towels first but couldn't figure out how to get the thing in the paper towel without touching it, so I Oh My Godded my way back to my apartment again to root around for another solution. My eyes lit upon my junk mail. I grabbed that and between the paper toweling and the ads I was able to pick the thing up quick and chuck it straight in the laundry room communal garbage can. I should have disposed of it outside, I suppose, but screw that.

So now, imagine this, I'm doing laundry again. Two more washes, each. Ick.

How the thing got in here I don't know. Dad thought it perhaps snuck in through the air conditioner. Entirely possible. But why? It's not cold outside yet, and this house presumably contains enough Eau de Cat to keep out any rodent with half a brain.

I have gotten over the slight low grade panic, but I am still definetly grossed out. It was dead in my clothes...

And I obviously live with two worthless freeloaders. What the hell?

2007-09-02T22:57:00.000-05:00

My entire body hurts.

Dancing like a maniac for 3 1/2 hours followed by sitting in a car much of the next day will do that to you.

Why, oh why do I insist on doing the Pony so vertically? Why do I have to hop on the Electric Slide turn? Why didn't I take off my 3" heels before the returned soldier dragged me out on the floor? Why did I wear those heels in the first place?

I have blisters on my toes, my calves have seized up, my back cracks every time I move. This had better be over by tomorrow morning.

I have to say, though. I've been to loads of weddings. Likely in the hundreds, somewhere. And this has to be about the best one I've ever been at. Well, it may be #2, as seeing a bride breathing fire in her wedding dress is probably never going to be beaten.

It was just perfect. Casual, on the lake at sunset, and them.

So many people seem to have this image in their head of what The Ideal Wedding must be. White dress, matching bridesmaids, fancy flowers, white tablecloths. Tuxes and suits, satin and heels dyed to match. The ever-present Canon. Oh, how I hate that thing.

The only person in anything remotely like a tux was the groom, who left off the suit coat portion. The 7 month old son of the couple dropped the ring box in the grass. The bride giggled when she read her vows, stumbling a bit over the words she wrote. The groom sang his vows, to a tune he wrote and with the accompaniment of his guitar that his buddy forgot to tune before the ceremony. We stood out in the grass and watched them gaze into each other's eyes. At least one onlooker was holding a beer.

We all cried.

It's a second wedding for them both. None too elaborate, none too fancy, none too ornate. They both had been there, done that. Realized they'd made a mistake. Now that they'd finally found who they were meant to be with, this time was for them, to fit who they really were and not who they presumed they should be.

Perfect.

2007-08-31T21:20:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow should prove to be an interesting day. I'm headed 'cross the border again to That Town. Friend getting married. Staying in a hotel for jah's sake, a cheezy Super 8, in the town I lived in for ten years of my life.

It's like I'm on Life Part IV:
I) Childhood
II) College
III) First job
IV) Second job, i.e. now

So weird. Parts 2 and 4 intersected at the end of July; parts 3 and 4 will intersect this weekend.

Parts 1 and 4 collide all the time. It's like I'm four different people, but I'm not.

So weird.

Wedding should be a good time, though. It's a couple of former co-workers and they're both really great people. They're getting hitched on the beach at sunset, and I'm sure it's going to be just beautiful. It's likely to be a hell of a party. They know fun people, and I've more than once closed a place down while in their company. I'm also hoping to see loads of former co-workers. I miss that place sometimes. The feeling of family. I've yet to find that here, with work, at least. But I can consider my two closest co-workers friends, I think, and that's a good start.

2007-08-30T21:16:00.000-05:00

"There’re only six things you need if you want to snag a good woman: A guitar, chicken, wine, a car, running water, and some permanent markers. If you don’t have a guitar, a lute will do. You get those six things and you’re Don Juan, trust me."

-Creed Bratton

2007-08-24T22:48:00.000-05:00

So my cat just lost my jump drive. That I got from work. Yesterday. *sigh* That's what I get for putting a nice tempting chord on the end of it. I now have three jump drives - one for work I just received, one work gave me in the bag of chords I also got yesterday to go with my other new computer toys (I think they'd forgotten they already gave me one), and the personal one I bought two years ago before work finally got with the times. Oh - two squirrels are chasing each other around the tree outside. Maybe this'll distract the cat enough to give me the opportunity I need... ah yes, there it is. Right under her butt. Lovely.

I got a bunch of toys yesterday, which was quite nice. The folks who organized these things did a great job idiot-proofing it all. The chords are labeled which end goes in to which end, we have instructions online, we practiced it in the lab at the office, etc. My problem is needing to write a grant and jump through a ton of hoops in order to get stuff I should be getting anyway. Drives me nuts.

Headed out to the Fair today. Met H and M at a park and ride at the U. H and I have been doing this almost every year for a long time. It was fun to have an 8 month old along - M especially liked the poultry barn. I didn't even get pooped on. The food was yummy as always. Had a deep fried candy bar, which I haven't had in a while. Mmm. Fried fruit was new this year, and different than I thought it would be. Decent, though. The fruit was a little tasteless. Lost something in the frying process. A cousin of mine entered knitted socks and won a blue ribbon, which is pretty cool. I'm happy for her. She makes awesome stuff, and deserves to be recognized. Someday, I hope to have both the guts and the skill to do that myself.

A sad little update - they think they've found everyone now and we're up to 13 dead. That plus the 7 dead in flooding this weekend makes for quite a couple of weeks around here. Between the drought, the floods, and the bridge, I wonder how much geography is currently listed as a federal disaster area.

The painters are still here, still sitting around on the steps of the building opposite, smoking (leaving butts everywhere of course), and making crude comments really loudly. Sure wish they'd get things done and go bother someone else.

Had a good time at the family reunion. Cousin of mine showed up unexpectedly, and it was nice having the prodigal back home. He stayed with his sister and drove up a little late, just to surprise them. Could only stay for a few hours as he had to fly out again. He made some serious points with his folks, that's for sure. Cold as heck, though. We baked last year and froze this. Ugh. Predictable, I suppose.

Song of the day: Hey There Delilah by the Plain White T's. I know, I know, it's been everywhere lately. Boring. But I swear I liked it before it hit heavy rotation. Combo of acoustic guitar and strings, I think. Gets me every time.

2007-08-17T21:47:00.000-05:00

I got pooped on today.

How, you may ask, is that different from any other day? Ah, because I was pooped on with real poop instead of metaphorical poop. Pea green baby poop, to be precise, all over my left leg. Thankfully, the leg was covered with pants at the time, but it was a small comfort. This after the same child grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled it forward to look down. And I'd never even met him before! Kids these days. Just too precocious.

Tomorrow morning I have to be at the folks' at 7:30 for the trip up north for the family reunion. Will be nice to see the fam, but not nice that early in the a.m. on a Saturday. Eesh.

2007-08-09T21:30:00.000-05:00

Today I had to travel about an hour south of here to go to a workshop for work.

Different bridge (obviously). Different river. Same road.

It was a little disconcerting.

More bodies were pulled out today, bringing the total officially to 6 identified; the other remains they're not sure, but they think it might be of two other people.

"They're not sure." "It might."

Can't say I would want to be one of those divers.

At the workshop this afternoon, one of our presenters named Bridget was telling a story. She quoted a conversation she had with someone. "Bridge..."

The whole room tensed. You could feel us all take a collective breath. It took us a second to realize she was referring to the other person's nickname for her, not a slab of concrete and metal that should be suspended 60 feet above a river but instead is a part of it.

It's no longer the lead story on CNN. Local news reports are talking about the lack of rain again, and discussing training camp for college football. We're moving on, or trying to.

I'm thinking people are going to be jumpy for a while yet.

2007-08-07T10:53:00.000-05:00

SONNET 116
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

2007-08-04T10:29:00.000-05:00

"It is really true what philosophy tells us, that life must be understood backwards. But with this, one forgets the second proposition, that it must be lived forwards. A proposition which, the more it is subjected to careful thought, the more it ends up concluding precisely that life at any given moment cannot really ever be fully understood; exactly because there is no single moment where time stops completely in order for me to take position [to do this]: going backwards."

(Or, as it is often shortened to: "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.") - Søren Kierkegaard, Danish philosopher (1813-1855). From Journalen JJ:167 (1843)

So here I sit on a rainy (for once) Saturday morning, the cat's tail firmly planted on my keyboard as she sinks down low, only her ears and alert whiskers showing out the window to the two crows causing a ruckus outside. She tips her head up so she can see and doesn't move a muscle, barely breathing. This is Great White Hunter mode, and I see it fairly often due to the abundance of squirrels and birds of various sorts around here. What she thinks she'd do with these crows if she got them I don't know, and I don't want to know. Yesterday we had a squirrel on the deck, munching on one of my plants that I have a hard enough time keeping alive as it is, thank you very much. They both sleeked down into Hunter Mode, the one flat to the floor in front of the patio door, the other pasted to the back of the couch, only eyes moving, an occasional ear twitch. The squirrel just sat there calmly eating lunch, its front two paws shoving the stolen goods into its mouth, for whatever reason not realizing that there was a deadly predator less than 8 feet away. It got done and made to run across the deck, and that's when it finally noticed it was being stalked. Squirrel panic! It shot a couple of feet back and forth in indecision, then down the corner pole and away. The cats seemed disappointed. But there's always another creature to stalk. Perhaps next time they'll really kill the Big Bad Milk Jug Ring before it escapes. One never knows. It pays to be prepared, always.

29 folks in the hospital, 8 still missing and presumed dead. The NTSB figures the south end of the bridge shifted 81 feet but they're thinking that's not the cause of the problem. What that means, I don't know. Dubya spent time today crawling around on the wreckage, or doing whatever his Secret Service people and his spin doctors felt he should do. Unfortunate that more couldn't have been done before, instead of all this flurry after. But then, that's the way it always happens, isn't it?

2007-08-01T20:30:00.000-05:00

Wow. Just. Wow.

There's...

There's been a bit of a disaster. Of pretty serious proportions.

A bridge collapsed. They don't know how bad it is yet. Bumper to bumper traffic at the time, and the thing just went down. It looks like an earthquake hit. But we don't have earthquakes around here. Cars in the river, semi trailers on fire, school bus full of kids with the front end smashed in.

Pray.

2007-07-30T16:11:00.000-05:00

I still haven't managed the strength for a full re-read.

The book comes with me around the house. I dip in and out of it, looking things up to check something, re-reading one scene at a time.

It still makes me cry.

2007-07-26T16:40:00.000-05:00

Just been idly dinging around today. Heading 'cross state lines tomorrow to visit B and go to Much Ado About Nothing at an outdoor theatre near there. We go every year to see some play or the other, generally Shakespeare, generally a comedy. Will be good to see B. Haven't seen her son or hubby in a while, so that will be fun too. They have a blog so I do get to see pictures, which is cool. Whatever did parents do before the Internet?

It occurred to me that this will be my first time in that state since moving back. It's been a year since I've been there. That's the longest stretch of time in about 15 years.

I'm not quite sure how to take that.

I mean, when I lived there, part of me always felt like an outsider, not native, like I didn't belong. Like I wanted to move back here. And now the shoe's on the other foot. I'm finding myself missing things more than I thought I would. It's just a little weird. How am I going to feel, crossing the bridge over the river that forms the border between the two states? I always used to feel just a little down, leaving here to go back there. Reading that "Thanks for visiting!" sign just before I crossed the border, leaving my former home to go back to my new home... And now... will I feel a little down, going the other direction?

I still flip the wrong switch half the time when I go into the kitchen. In my old apartment, the kitchen light switch was on the far side of the door. Here, it's on the near. I dig in the wrong drawer, looking for stuff. I sometimes get a little disoriented, waking up from sleep. I forget that there's no longer a Walgreen's within walking distance and I can no longer get the beer I like. The politics are a bit different. The feel is a bit different. Yet the same, all at the same time.

Half of me wonders if I'm going to feel like this for another 15 years. Neither fish, nor fowl. I guess my life has just felt... temporary, somehow. Incomplete. For a long time.

I'm not quite sure what that means.

2007-07-24T21:38:00.000-05:00

It is 77 degrees in my bedroom.

It is 74 degrees in my living room.

The maintenance guys put a new air conditioner in today.

I am the happiest person on Planet Earth.

2007-07-23T13:37:00.000-05:00

OK. So I am first to admit that this time of year I'm not really working very hard. My work is done in fits and starts with lots of time in between having snacks, reading Harry Potter message boards, reading the book I'm currently on about the Salem witch trials, etc. I'm not breaking my neck, in other words.

So do I know so little about how other people earn their living? Is it wrong that I'm appalled watching the painters? And the guys who mulched the trees? The painters were in my building last week and are currently in the building across the way. I can't tell you how many times I've looked up this morning to see one or more of them on the steps having a smoke, on the phone, or just yakking with each other. And the language! I'd count the number of times some variation of the f-bomb got dropped, but it'd be too depressing. Mulchers, same thing, except right outside my window instead of across the courtyard. I appreciated the proximity to the cigarette fumes and the blue language, let me tell you. Obviously in no big hurry, even while doing work. No sense of urgency, of professionalism, of the need to get the job done and get it done right and efficiently. No courtesy to those around them who may not appreciate the language, if nothing else. There's kids around here.

Not to take away from how hard it is to do anything requiring physical labor in the heat and humidity, but if I sat on my butt that long I'd get canned, never mind the riots that would ensue long before due to my lack of control over the proceedings. And if a person wants to smoke or use bad language, that's their choice. But I shouldn't have to be penalized for their stupidity.

Maybe it's just me, but is there no sense of personal integrity, no pride in one's work? No common courtesy?

2007-07-21T14:33:00.000-05:00

My. My my oh my.

Got the book at 12:05, home and reading by about 12:20, surfaced for the final time at 5:30, staring around blearily at a world that somehow seemed completely changed.

I swallowed it in one big gulp and want to do a full re-read. Went through a couple of parts today. I laughed, I cried, I yelled "yes!" in triumph. There's still questions I'd like answered, but that's OK for now.

Now I just need to sit for a while and take it in.

----------------------------------------------------

Oh, the torment bred in the race,
the grinding scream of death
and the stroke that hits the vein,
the hemorrhage none can staunch, the grief,
the curse no man can bear.

But there is a cure in the house,
and not outside it, no,
not from others but from them,
their bloody strife. We sing to you,
dark gods beneath the earth.

Now hear, you blissful powers underground -
answer the call, send help.
Bless the children, give them triumph now.

Aeschylus, The Libation Bearers

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still. For they must needs be present, that love and live in that which is omnipresent. In this divine glass, they see face to face; and their converse is free, as well as pure. This is the comfort of friends, that though they may be said to die, yet their friendship and society are, in the best sense, ever present, because immortal.

William Penn, More Fruits of Solitude

2007-07-20T21:00:00.001-05:00

More adventures today.

I attempted yet more canning - pickles, this time. We'll see how that comes out. One of the issues with all of this is that whenever I can I end up with water all over creation as the stuff boils and oozes out the top. Today was a treat as I was attempting to mop up and get ready to go at the same time - I was due at K's at 2 for another boating outing. Yay!

There were 5 of us this time, out in the boat, on the lake. An interesting glimpse of how rich people live. Some of the houses on the lake are past immense. Lots of huge, gorgeous boats as well, many multi-deck, some looking like they belonged on one of the Great Lakes instead of where we were. We also saw a lot of exceedingly cool wooden boats. Really beautiful, stunning workmanship and care. Just amazing stuff. We stopped at a waterside establishment for some food and drink and just watched them all go by, wooden and historic, modern and speedy, ginormous and loud. As we were gawking at a particularly nice wooden craft, the ultimate coolest boat I have ever seen in my life caught our attention - a steam powered wooden boat, just like the African Queen. Wow. Just... wow. The guy was burning wood, I think, judging from the smell, and the boat chugged alongside where we were sitting, smoke coming out of the stack, as he maneuvered it into one of the few remaining slips. Really quite cool.

Saw more loons as well, some ducks, some lily pads (no frogs). It was a touch under 80 degrees, a few wisps of cirrus clouds, a slight breeze. Perfect day.

So now I idly blog, waste time, wait to leave to pick up DH, then read 'till I'm done, nap, then to P's 60th birthday party - a surprise. Going to be a good time.

2007-07-20T20:54:00.000-05:00

Three more hours.

I'm planning on leaving for the bookstore about 11:15 or so, I think. Can't wait.

I'm a little nervous and a little sad all wrapped up with the excitement. This will be the last time, ever. The close of a world-wide phenomenon that I have been privileged to be a part of. I remember what it was like before cell phones, before the internet, even before people had computers in homes and schools. But this is the one the grandkids would ask about: What was it like, when Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was finally released? An amazing thing. Millions of people all over the world doing one thing at the same time - reading the exact same book. How utterly amazing is that?

2007-07-15T21:56:00.000-05:00

"The Shame of Minneapolis," a legendary 1903 article by journalist Lincoln Steffens:

This is a fascinating article both with insights into the history of Minneapolis and with "muckraking journalism" of the early 1900s. Steffens collected his writings into a book titled The Shame of the Cities, published in 1904. This link has the introduction to the book, also interesting for Steffens' views on political corruption. Read them both, I'm telling you. The intro especially.

"They were written with a purpose, they were, published serially with a purpose, and they are reprinted now together to further that same purpose, which was and is—to sound for the civic pride of an apparently shameless citizenship.

"There must be such a thing, we reasoned. All our big boasting could not be empty vanity, nor our pious pretensions hollow sham. American achievements in science, art, and business mean sound abilities at bottom, and our hypocrisy a race sense of fundamental ethics. Even in government we have given proofs of potential greatness, and our political failures are not complete; they are simply ridiculous. But they are ours. Not alone the triumphs and the statesmen, the defeats and the grafters also represent us, and just as truly. Why not see it so and say it?

"Because, I heard, the American people won’t “stand for” it. You may blame the politicians, or, indeed, any one class, but not all classes, not the people. Or you may put it on the ignorant foreign immigrant, or any one nationality, but not on all nationalities, not on the American people. But no one class is at fault, nor any one breed, nor any particular interest or group of interests. The misgovernment of the American people is misgovernment by the American people."

- Lincoln Steffens

2007-07-12T19:08:00.000-05:00

So this morning about 10 am I got a call from Dad. He was heading out to work and was ready for me to start trucking out there myself - I was scheduled to be an unpaid consultant, i.e. slave labor, for his business. Lots of heavy boxes to deliver around town today.

I started getting myself together, finding my shoes, bringing along stuff to do if there was any downtime, when I heard the first siren.

Then I heard another one. And another. And they were all coming this way. The sirens kept coming and coming and coming, almost constantly.

What on Earth?

The first thing I thought is, oh no, another bank robbery and hostage situation. What that says about both me and this neighborhood, I don't care to think.

I didn't figure I'd better leave the house until I figured out what I was driving into. So, I hopped online. Yet one more reason to love the Internet - within about 10 minutes, one of the local news stations had posted it.

The apartment complex next door was on fire.

Now, "next door" is a tad bit of an exaggeration as there's a street and a couple businesses between us and them. They're close enough, however, that the Red Cross Disaster Relief team is using our parking lot and clubhouse as a staging area. One of the caretakers here told me that it was a 6 alarm fire. About 200 people were evacuated, plus loads of dogs and cats, many of which the firefighters were able to save. No people were hurt.

Yet again, one is reminded how wonderful firefighters truly are, and how precarious life really is.

Edit: As of the 10 p.m. news, all the pets and all the people were saved.

Hug a firefighter. And your pets.

2007-07-11T18:02:00.000-05:00

It's been cool the past couple of days. What a relief. Paid bills, balanced the checkbook, cleaned the 'fridge, and cleaned the cat box; what fun. Stupid cat went and peed on the bathroom rug as I was cleaning out the commode - couldn't you wait five more minutes? - so am also doing laundry. Am waiting for a phone call from Dad to go help him out at work. Sorting and carrying boxes in my future. Hey - better his work than mine. ;)

A was in town with her fam Sun-Tues - her bro is starting college here in the fall. Hadn't seen her since I moved, so that was fun. We went out to breakfast and just wandered around downtown for a while. Been beautiful the last few days, so we ate our sandwiches in a park and listened to a band playing for the lunchtime crowd. Bless the singer's heart, she tried. Tone was wavery and the pitch wasn't centered, but hey - she's the one who had the guts to get up on that stage and belt out "Summertime", not me.

Going out with some friends tonight to see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. We're going to see it at the IMAX. The ending is supposed to be 3D, and I'm hoping that means the big battle at the Ministry. Nice. The theatre is new and has a little cafe, so we'll meet early for drinks and chatting. One of the group is having a birthday today, so that's going to be a little something special. Hey - sweets will be involved. Life is good.

OK, so it's not a song of the day, but a link to the screenplay for what must be one of the Best Movies on Planet Earth, When Harry Met Sally. So while we're at it, here's a question: can men and women be friends, or is Harry right and it's impossible? My first inclination is to say that Harry is out to lunch - I have tons of friends of the opposite sex that I have never done a darn thing with, in a "more than friends" sense. Indeed, that was a hallmark in high school - I was the only person who never dated any of the guys in "the group," and lo-and-behold, I'm still friends with all of them now. I've always been happy about that. My male friends are pretty wonderful people, and I'm proud to claim 'em.

Psychology Today article
Ebony magazine article

But then again, I can see what they mean about the sexual tension. I can't deny it. Not with everyone, but with one or two, over the years. Hmm.

And here's another question, kind of inspired by the first: What do women generally prefer, the Alpha or the Beta Male?

I have to admit to leaning towards the beta since before the term was coined. One childhood memories that really sticks with me is a conversation with the mother of some friends of mine. She was talking about her husband - not a classic good looker, but a sweet, wonderful man - and cautioning us to see beyond appearances. Alphas sure are pleasant to look at, but who do you really want to go home to at the end of the day?

Yet, I find it so interesting that on a quick Google search, "alpha male" led to lots of articles in men's magazines and the like on how to become more of an alpha and get more women, whereas "beta male" led to titles such as "BETA MALE; Losing Your Virility? Tough It Out, Man" and from the Urban Dictionary definition: "Pete knew he was losing the girl he'd just met at the bar to the guy who bought her a drink, but he was too much of a beta male to do anything about it." Interesting look at how men see the world, or at least, men's magazines. Am I really that out of touch that I prefer betas? Do some, even most, women really and truly prefer alphas? For real? And are men really that... I dunno... scared(?) of being thought of as a wimp?

2007-07-06T00:27:00.000-05:00

-- written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s --

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

http://www.fleurdelis.com/desiderata.htm

2007-07-05T22:51:00.000-05:00

Independence Day in the U.S. is a funny thing. The day is not considered complete without the American tradition of witnessing a Chinese tradition - fireworks displays. The park was filled with people, and it's interesting how in this 21st century computerized-special effects world, it was mostly quiet, faces turned to the sky, occasional "oo!" at a particularly cool blast.

A good way to restore tranquility - blowing bubbles for a pair of enraptured cats.

2007-07-04T12:24:00.000-05:00

I have just had more adventure than I really needed to have today. I have a whole new respect for our foremothers, as well as for anyone who actually does real work for a living.

I'm sitting here, alternately typing and nursing my wounds, after a morning spent canning. Yes, canning for real. Remember them 8 pints of strawberries? There's only so many one person can eat and so much freezer jam one can make. So I decided to *shudder* try canning.

What the heck was I thinking?

Thanks to TAG, I have equipment on loan. I'm starting to wonder how grateful I should be, but never mind that now. Anyway, she dropped off the canner with a whole ginormous Rubbermaid container full of stuff, plus some recipe books, and she talked me through the process. We agreed that it sure seems as if the process is pretty idiot-proof, as long as you follow the directions.

I'm thinking right about now that I'm a pretty big idiot.

So I read the book carefully, got out all the stuff, carefully set it out, washed what needed to be washed, got all four burners on the stove going, thinking I was pretty cool.

Well, pretty hot, actually, as I had all four burners going and it's July, but you know what I mean.

See, you have to have the canner simmering, ready for the jars, the jars simmering, ready for the jam, the jam cooking up, and extra boiling water ready to keep the jars properly submersed in the canner. I even had my candy thermometer out, checking the temp of the water. Nice. I was stirring the jam, waiting for it to boil, all proud of myself...

...when I discovered on a re-read that I hadn't followed the directions carefully after all. Boil strawberries and pectin first, then add sugar, dummy.

Oh dear.

The stuff, of course, didn't gel after the one minute rolling boil like it was supposed to. So I cooked it... and cooked it.. and cooked it, stirring like a maniac and praying it would hurry up and come together before it burnt. Problem is, as I have learned while making both caramels and peanut brittle, sugary mixes tend to pop when boiled. I ended up with a strawberry mess all over the place, including the stove, the floor, and various bit of my body.

I'm holding an ice cube wrapped in dripping paper towel on my right wrist on the worst of the burns. I don't think any got on the cats but I'm not sure - they wisely deserted the field after the stuff started bubbling over onto the floor. Nobody's meowing in agony and I see no suspicious licking of sticky body parts.Anyway, it hit my feet, stomach, both hands, and forehead. I'm going to look really cute at my cousins' tonight. I think the one on my wrist might be really not-so-good - when I remove the ice cube to wring out the paper towel, I see a little raised bump... *sigh*

The stuff did eventually gel, albeit about one cup less in volume than it should have. I'm a little afraid. I think the canning process itself worked out alright, but Lord only knows how that stuff will taste. I can find out in 12-24 hours.

Meanwhile, I may stay away from farmers' markets for a while...nothing but trouble.

Oh yeah - my cousins. I think I mentioned this yesterday but can't remember for sure, given today's events - the fog of war will do that to you - the folks and I are heading over to a cousin's house tonight for yacking and fireworks. They have a park a couple blocks away that we go to and watch the city shoot off bombs. Fun. This, of course, means I have more cooking yet to do - I want to bring something over to their house to share. This means I need to get off the butt, into the shower, and over to the grocery store.

Notice how motivated I am.

I am starting to get a bit hungry, though, so think I'll have lunch and get things started. Was really going to do laundry at some point as well... Ah well.

Happy 4th!

2007-07-03T19:19:00.000-05:00

A banner day around here - the letter "p" on my keyboard has worked almost the entire day. It crapped out on me sometime around March. Notice how I haven't gotten around to returning the thing yet... I've been operating with cut-and-paste, mainly. Laziness combined with a crazy life, most of the time. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. Nowdays it's just lazy. ;)

But today I can "p" again. Don't know why it disappeared in the first place or why it occasionally returns... poltergeist?

Boy, is it a joy to type with a working keyboard. Poltergeist poltergeist poltergeist. Peter Piper picked a pack of pickled peppers. Yeehaw!

I even practiced today. Will wonders never cease? Figure I should get the hands back in shape - I have a gig coming up next week - wedding gig, for people getting married on...

FRIDAY THE 13TH (bum bum buuummmmmm)

I'm sure we'll end up playing the Taco Bell, which I hate, but just about everyone else seems to like. There's no accounting for taste, i.e. the majority of the world is stupid. ;) Worked on some Bach today, mainly. I'm not sure what we'll be playing for the wedding, so didn't bother much with that. You can't go wrong with Bach, in any case. Did some old stuff and some newish - E-flat truly is an evil key. Yeesh.

Spent the last couple of days getting out a couple of Evites and starting a blog for a family gathering coming up. A cousin of mine used to run the thing in conjunction with an aunt but she got smart and quit and I, being dumb, volunteered. Smart girl, my cousin, not that I've done much work at this point.

My cousin is extremely good at throwing parties - thinks of those nice little touches that bring things that couple of steps up to something really neat, that I would never think of and would never have the patience for if I did. She's organized, thoughtful, and takes the time to make things special. If she has her hand in a party, it's going to be a good one. I, however, have the advantage of being impervious to whining, complaining, and things not going as planned, and I rarely if ever take things to heart. I ain't got that kind of time.

I'm really an anomaly in the family on many levels.

Oh - and then H gave me a Webkinz, of all things. This really is one of the strangest darn things. You get a stuffed critter and then have a virtual version online that you feed, bathe, decorate their room, and hang out with and play games. Her nieces are addicted to the things and they got her onto it. So far mine has a bed, two chairs, a TV, and a bathtub, although it really is contrary to my instincts to give a cat a bath. Very weird. I've decided I think I like playing the Cash Cow, but I'm a little ashamed to admit it.

Song of the day: American Idol Loser Song