Saturday, May 31, 2008

Scattershot

Serious hail today - about the size of a 50 cent piece. Stripped the leaves off the trees. Quite a sight. And a sound. Wow.

Today's terribly amusing website: http://www.readatwork.com/. It has reading material like Dickinson's poetry and Twain's short stories set up in such a way to look like powerpoint presentations, so it's harder for you to get caught if you choose to spend your time on the job doing something more productive than actual work. Entertaining, at least.

Going to spend much of tomorrow at work. Bah.

Now to sleep; perchance to dream...

Sunday, May 25, 2008

The Last Full Measure

" We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm. " - George Orwell


Gettysburg Address - Abraham Lincoln

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation, so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate—we can not consecrate—we can not hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.



(More Lincoln Portrait stuff here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4165357)


Friday, May 23, 2008

Today didn't suck

I'm a tiny bit crispy; just a little pink in the upper chest and the tops of my arms. Don't feel all that hot - sun, wind, scary Biffs, too much crappy food and a few adult libations will do that to you. But now I'm out of the sun, have had a chance to go to a real bathroom, and have a little of the pink stuff, so I'm feeling much better.

Some serious hard core adventures today. Get Out of Jail Free cards will get that for you.

I of course was late getting to J's house. I swear he said to turn left at Bill's... anyway, I was driving around and around and around - the whole thing was exactly like "Little Boxes". Except there was a tan one, and a tan one, and a tan one, and a tan one...

We ended up singing the song much of the day. It's a bit... insidious, I suppose one could say. Sticks with a person. Oh boy, does it.

Anyway, after multiple phone calls and stops for map viewing, I made it to J's little box and J and K and I left for breakfast. They hopped in my car and we drove downtown. My car - really, all cars - are just too small for J. And of course he accidentally hit the seat warmer on the way in and had a conniption fit. "Why the hell is my butt warm?!?" he roared. "How the hell do you turn it off?!?" K and I were laughing so hard we couldn't see, which isn't good when you're driving down the Interstate at 60. Man.

We met P at a cool little greasy spoon down on campus. The place is a riot. It's maybe the width of my bedroom, at best; something like 10 feet. Seriously. There's a long counter of about 14 stools, and the line forms behind the stools. There's barely room to breathe. It is not a place for the claustrophobic or the obese. Once someone finishes eating, the first person in line must somehow find space to scootch between the stools and the line in the back to the empty stool in question. You sit down to stare at a wall full of memorabilia, mainly money from various foreign countries, all dusty. The main cook is to the right, flipping pancakes and hashbrowns on the oldest equipment I believe I've ever seen still in use. He must have asbestos fingers. Turned a lot of stuff with the hands. Wow. And of course they do the stereotypical diner technique of yelling out orders and that they need more round plates and all that stuff. Any customer who breaks the many unwritten rules is yelled at as well. Much fun. And darned tasty food. I had blueberry pancakes and hashbrowns and was quite content. Oof.

For some bizarre reason, J and K got a bee in their bonnet that we needed to go down the road to some scary little joint that I suspect would be truly frightening at night. What drives anyone to drink their breakfast, I don't know. There were several older men in there doing just that. We didn't fit in, and I have to say I'm glad of it. But it was an experience. Getting there was craziness in itself - I was driving, had no idea where I was going, and J didn't have too many clues either. That led to one of the hands-down best lines of the day. He told me to take a right turn and then said "take the turn a little wide in case we need to abort." Nice.

We headed back to J's house to pick up the boat, the snackies, and the other important accoutrements to a day on the water.

Then, out to the lake. It's not a far drive in miles but it's a little amusing in the change of the people and the things. The lake has been the city person's and rich person's playground for over 100 years, and it shows. It's an interesting place. The lake is big and wandering, with lots of interconnected bays. The channels between the bays are often so narrow that there's bridges over them with roads and railroads crossing and crisscrossing. There're quite a few charter operations on the water, including the one with the local football team and the boat scandal of a year or two ago. We passed by that place, which was a nice moment. Some beautiful old historic steamboats and wooden motorboats, huge houses, rich folks and their toys.

We saw lots of funny things. One of the longer bridges had some entertaining graffiti: OPD Blows (heart) Seniors '08. And they signed it. That was smart. I'm sure the police department in question will never, never see it and never, never catch them. They're too wily. J loves to drive as fast as possible, then slows way down so we can just float and soak up the atmosphere. We played chicken with a couple geese at one point. We saw a boat floating mysteriously and appearing unoccupied... but we're pretty sure we know what was going on inside. We debated about going over and "asking if they needed help," but figured we'd likely see more than we really needed to see.

We also went to a couple of dockside establishments, the type where you can pull your boat up to a slip and go in to have one or two. They have parking attendants, so to speak, guys that come up and help you tie and untie your boat. Very posh. We saw several rich kids back from college, busily hitting on the waitresses. Oh, the humanity. We just wanted to smack so many of them. Honey, gotta tell you: you aren't as good looking as you think you are. Lots of women with fake tans and too many plastic surgeries wearing clothes that just screamed that they were searching for Husband #4. And then what had to be a first date with some woman and a guy who looked like Mike Ditka. He was so earnest, the poor guy. One wonders how it all came out.

So we went home early, really, by 6:30 or so, but we were just exhausted. All day in the sun will do that to you. We had a great time, though, and like I said, it didn't suck.

What a wonderful day.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Playing Monopoly

I can't wait 'till Friday. Oh boy.

So my boss gave a few of us an exchange day for a massive project for which we put in a bunch of time back in February. In two lousy days, well 1 1/2 now, we're using our Get Out of Jail Free cards and blowing this popcorn stand.

(How many more metaphors can I mix in one sentence?)

The plan involves drinking, eating, and boating, not necessarily in that order. Friday is supposed to be 75 and sunny. Can we say hallelujah? So lunch today was spent watching deleted scenes from The Office and making a list of who is bringing what. I've got the honey peanut butter Cheerios thingies. Yum.

On the job scene, I'm still in a bit of a holding pattern, although it's not as bad as it was. I know I have a job now, at least; the 80% thing has been officially offered. Now it's just a matter of waiting 'till they determine if it can actually be full time. About once every two days there's a new scenario; most recent one is my job remains precisely the same. One can hope.

Just a note in the You Get What You Pay For department - don't buy $3.99 wine from Trader Joe's. I love Joe's for most things, but sometimes... *whew* I need to learn how to make vinegar.

Have also been determining summer plans. Have several work things plus a trip to OH to see a friend, so there's potential for some amusement. Only wish gas prices weren't so high. Jumped about 20 cents today. Also figured out I get a lousy 20 per gallon, on a good week. WTH? Should be more than that, with my car...

Friday, May 16, 2008

Yet another work update

Holy crap, I tell you, it is Bee-you-tea-full out there. 79 degrees, sunny, a slight breeze. Just about perfect. Finally.

Big work thing yesterday that went quite well; better than pretty much all the participants thought it would. And it's over, so there's one less project for me to complete. Yay! Another big thing this weekend - a bit of a party, I suppose one could call it. Bought a dress for the event today at a new consignment shop - $16, baby. Yeah.

Side note: saw a guy today with the skyline of Minneapolis tattooed on the back of his forearm. Interesting choice.

As for work, I've been officially offered the 80% position. Unofficially, I might be full time. There's still hope. I'm a little nervous as I'm thinking that what I've been told is likely to happen won't - I suspect the person who told me what she's shooting for hasn't taken into account what other folks are likely to want. Ah well.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Today's amusement

OK, this is pretty funny. And yes, I sucked.

http://www.televisiontunes.com/game.html

Was also fun to head to the home page and browse through the thousands of TV theme songs they have. I found M.A.S.H., Hill Street Blues, and The Office, of course, but also Antiques Roadshow, Masterpiece Theatre, Skippy the Bush Kangaroo, and Nova. How many of you remember the MST3K theme song from when it was on KTMA? Yes!

I love the Internet.

I'm still sick; not so pumped about that. Better, though. Likely will be better just in time to have my projects done and finally be able to take a day off work. Ah well.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

SOTD

Been a while since I listed a song of the day. I guess this means I need to spend more time watching You Tube and less time whining about my life. Anyway:

Rosie Thomas: I Let Myself Fall

Sorry about the JAM mash-up vid; least of evils (I could have given you a Gilmore Girls one, after all).

Hadn't heard of Thomas before but think I really like her stuff. Check out her Myspace for more listening loveliness. So far I like all I've heard. I like "Much Farther to Go" as well.

A good song makes every part of me alert, even while my whole body relaxes.

In the And Now For Something Completely Different category: The Gipsy Kings covering Hotel California. Absolute unadulterated coolness. Talk about guitar playing.

While on that subject, check out the Rosenberg Trio and their cover of Don't Mean A Thing. Lord. Well, and Bireli Lagrene, for that matter. Here's Minor Swing with all of 'em. And yes, it is pronounced MEE-nor. Get it together, wouldja?

And, of course, the Kings themselves:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebaYm65RC5Q

What Django does with only 2 fingers, for all practical purposes ... man.

I hate colds. That is all.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Opportunity Costs

I'm dying, here.

I haven't yet seen this evening's episode of The Office. I can't read any fanfic, can't go on any message boards, can't do anything.

Granted, the trade-off was a good one - I ended up over at K's with T and H for dinner, drinks, conversation, and a viewing of Gone Baby Gone, which I hadn't seen. Darn fine flick. Been a while since I read the book as well - the book is incredible, terribly complex and terribly hard to read. Lehane's books are just wrenching. No good really comes out in the end, for anyone. Dark. Oh, so dark. But good.

Upshot of all this is, I'm too tired and too wound from the movie to watch my tape of The Office. So to bed for me. Dangit.

Did finish applying for my own job this afternoon. So that's done.

'Kay... really need to go to bed now.

After I find those Lehane books on my shelf. Now where did they go...

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

More Copious Whining

So here's the latest.

Found out Tuesday, finally, that I was going to have the opportunity to apply for my own job, more or less, only at about 80% of the hours and therefore 80% of the salary. Yay!

(read that little exclamation as you will)

The application process includes such questions as what technology I'm comfortable with and uploading my resume, transcripts, and letters of recommendation. Don't we already have those on file? And my address and phone as well? *sigh* So it's an awful lot of busy work. Not so thrilled. But some job is better than no job, and that's where I once was.

Rumor has it that I might get really lucky and be offered 100%. It may be different than what I'm currently doing, but again, a job is a job. As long as the checks don't bounce and my rent can be paid and I can buy cat food.

But this whole going-on-three-months-of-terrifying-uncertainty thing is getting a wee bit old. This year has been hellish enough. Let's not add to it, shall we?

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Escapism

Saw Leatherheads tonight. Cute little thing. Have heard it described as George Clooney's love letter to the era and that's pretty well accurate, I think. The music is top notch - another Randy Newman score. It's beautifully lit, and has some very clever moments. And, well, George Clooney and John Krasinski? H.O.T. So that was a plus.

Also saw the trailer for the new Indy movie.
Have been more than a little dubious, I admit it. But am starting to wonder if it really won't be that bad...

Friday, May 02, 2008

More stupid work talk, etc.

Meetings all day today and the only thing I got out of it was sympathy. No solid word yet. Am pretty disgusted with the lack thereof, to tell the truth. Rather startling thing that came out at a staff meeting was that once they figure out what jobs are still left, they will be posted externally. WTF? This means we need to apply for our own jobs?!?!? We were told we'd be automatically given a position if one was available. Lovely. Just lovely. I am definitely starting to feel screwed over, and I can't say as I like it.

Been thinking more on how I can economize and what I need to live on. I hate this. I've been out of college how long now? How much hard work? How much job experience? I shouldn't have to think like this.

I'm not normally this cynical and depressing, I swear.

Today marks exactly ten years since the downfall of Lord Voldemort. That's just about the coolest thing in the universe. Yay for The Boy Who Lived.

Tonight went to a theatrical production, a company of six teen actors that wrote most of the play themselves in collaboration with a teaching artist. I was extremely impressed. For junior high kids, they were well spoken, funny, moved well, were self possessed, and just generally kicked some serious butt.

Friend of mine and I were chatting about this lovely economy and she said that the budget that she and her husband have for gas is higher than their student loan payments. Oh yeah, no, we're not in a recession.

HEY! ATTENTION ALL THOSE IN CHARGE OF THESE THINGS!


THIS IS NOT GOOD!

And how on earth do you think a federal gas tax vacation will help? That'll save what, 18.4 cents per gallon? Current average is $3.48 in my area. So now I'm paying what, $3.30 at best, assuming prices don't go up even more? Ooooo..... Dude, news flash here: Cub coupons will pick that up for you.

My car has a 16.5 gallon tank. I fill up about 3 times a month. Let's do a little math, shall we?

  • 16.5 gallons x $3.48 per = $57.42 per fill up x 3 fill ups = $172.26 per month

(Jayzus. Shouldn't have done that math. The truth hurts. Yeowch.)

  • 16.5 gallons x $3.30 per = $54.45 per fill up x 3 fill ups = $163.35 per month


That makes for a grand total saved of...
(drum roll,
please)

  • $8.91

Now, I'm simplifying the math a tad as I don't go down to empty before I fill, so I actually spend a little less on gas. And $8.91 is $8.91. But really. It's like the tax rebate. What am I going to spend it on? Bills, of course. I'm not stupid.

How is that going to stimulate the economy?

ETA: Nice article in the Minnpost about it.


Thursday, May 01, 2008

Holding pattern

A few updates, in case you care:

Work thing this past weekend went exceedingly well. A good time was had by all. Much was learned, including the meaning of the terms isthmus and vibraphone. Lovely, lovely time. The boss even came to visit to specifically ask about things, which I thought was very nice of her. She does try to keep our spirits up.

Have day-long meetings tomorrow so hope to glean more gossip about the impending firings. Am currently in a holding pattern. Have gathered letters of recommendation and updated the resume. Now it's wait-and-see for another couple of weeks. Am not so pumped about doing work for next year right now - I'm basically doing work for nothing, or someone else's gain. Yay! Morale is low. Really low. But some volunteers came in over the weekend and completely redid the break room as they know how things have been. That's nice. Little things help.

Randomness for the day: OK, was wondering why I was hearing voices and didn't think it was my subconscious. Although these days that wouldn't surprise me. Turns out there's a coupla guys in the courtyard outside my office window throwing around a really cool light-up Frisbee. Nice.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

News Flash: Life Not So Bad After All

Today started crappily. Between the rain and cold, the early morning with little sleep, all the stuff I have to do, and my impending doom, I was not the happiest camper. Compounding my sorry state, The Issue got dredged up before the day was 45 minutes old and I was again explaining things with as little bitterness as I could manage to folks who didn't know the tale.

Thing is, I instantly had a good 20-25 people incensed on my behalf, to the point of bellering about starting petitions. They talked about how good I was at my job and how good I was for them specifically.

It was nice, and... well... sweet, really.

So I leave that little enclave, admittedly fairly close to teary, to go to onto my next mission of the day and I ran into my boss in the hall. We talked briefly about the big work thing I'm running over the weekend, and darned if she didn't wish me luck and give me a big hug.

*sigh*

Apparently I do some good in the world after all.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Bang on the drum all day

Today, I was at work for 13 hours straight. Yay! And much fun was had by all.

You do see the sarcastic slant of my handwriting there, don't you?

Much of the time was spent answering questions and trading rumors about the upcoming reduction in force. The place is going to look like a ripped open anthill; a third of us dead and the rest all scurrying around in an unreasoning panic. It has not been a good day.

It has not been a good few weeks. I can't focus. I wonder why. And I can't make myself plan ahead and do work for too much in advance, I mean, what's the likely hood that all my planning is for naught? Pretty darn good, I'd say.

Although it was nice to hear several people say that they were sorry, the place wouldn't be the same without me, I'm an asset, thank me for my work, etc. Silver lining. Silver lining.

This weekend will be work-filled as well. Am in charge of a fairly massive undertaking from about 6:45 Saturday morning through 'til Monday night. That too will be fun as all heck - acting peppy through all this has not been my favorite. I generally am better at focusing on other things and just letting stuff go but that hasn't been happening recently.

Need to stop brooding and get to bed. Bah. Humbug. Need to read more comics and get myself in a better mood.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Conspicuous Consumerism

I have way too many CDs.

Well, really I don't. But I do. But I don't.

I generally feel my CD collection is pitiful. Just pitiful. I have no Nepalese music in the stacks, for instance. Buddhist monks and Catholic monks chanting (2 separate disks, natch), folk music from Uganda, the Wisconsin Badger Marching Band, and the Minnesota Orchestra's recent recording of Beethoven 1, but nothing from Nepal. This may seem silly to most folks but it came back to haunt me at work today when I got caught a bit flat footed knowing nothing about music from Nepal. Long story.

(http://www.ccoder-usa.org/, if you must know)

Anyway, that was fairly fresh in my mind when in a fit of work avoidance this evening I decided to put my CDs in some semblance of order. Hence the "too many CDs!" "not enough CDs!" plaint. In the too many category: What a storage nightmare. Not enough shelf space so things are jammed in every which way and I can't see what I have. I ran across at least two CDs that I'd totally forgotten I own. They're sorted loosely by category, but with lack of space I can't do much more than that. ABC order might be even too anal for me, but I'm getting to that point.

But yet. No music from Nepal. One lousy CD from Australia. One! Only one CD of Japanese music as well, and it's orchestral - no folk music. I still don't own U2 Joshua Tree or Beatles Sergeant Pepper, which is a travesty. I mean, really.

CD thoughts remind me of a stand partner from long ago. Professional ensemble, but this was a young kid with much to learn. Much. OK, middle of rehearsal, swear to God:

"I have 200 CDs."

Really? Wow. Amazing. Now:

KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT DURING REHEARSAL, FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU, TWELVE?!?

He was annoying in many ways, but I really coulda smacked him after that one.

Freakin' phone was out much of yesterday which also meant no internet; drat you Qwest.

Random thing that has nothing to do with the previous (two) rant(s): My loud upstairs neighbors reached a new low today. Beautiful out there this evening (i.e. up above 60) so I opened my patio door to let in sun and air and let the cats smell smells and see sights.

Problem is, the neighbors thought the same way. They sent their two elephants disguised as small children out to their deck just above mine to go play. Lovely.

SQUEEEE! BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM SQUEEEEEEEEE! BOOM BOOM SQUEEEEEEEE!

Oh. My. God. Cats were looking at me like the world was going to come crashing in on us at any time and I was fairly certain they were right. The "BOOM BOOM BOOM" noise was familiar to me as that's the soundtrack to my life on a regular basis - I think they may be interior designers as they're continually doing something that sounds like moving furniture - but the "SQUEEEE!" is usually more muffled.

Almost makes me wish for cold weather again... but not quite...

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Update for D...

...who is likely the only person who reads this.

*grin*

Let's see... what's new around here? Just my typical social butterfly weekend: Am going out to dinner tonight to some new place with an old friend. That'll be fun. Tomorrow am heading to B&Cs new place for dinner and cards, not that I know where they live. Best get on that. Need to do some hard core cleaning as might have something for work at my house Monday night. Cat peed on my sweatshirt again, so I'm thinking the litter needs to be on the list.

Have big stuff for work next weekend and need to make sure I'm ready for that as well... it's one of those projects where I'm sure I've forgotten something and that's what's making me crazy - that I can't recall what I've forgotten.

Speaking of work, it's been a bit rough lately. A HUGE reduction in force is coming. My building alone is losing somewhere around 29%. I'm quite likely to be on that list. Can't say as I'm so pumped about that. Rumors are flying - got a call last night from a colleague who was pretty irate that she was told her job would be changing. Used quite colorful language. One hopes she'll be OK. One hopes we'll all be OK. But it's not going to happen. Best case scenario: I'll still be there and my job will change. Much more likely: do you want fries with that?

There's not a ton that can be done about it. We don't have as much money coming in, costs have to be cut. That's simple economics. What pisses me off is that my department seems to be getting hit the hardest. Hard to tell how much of that is perception and how much is The Truth. It's also a bit rough that I work my butt off, am good at my job, am well liked, my bosses want to keep me, but I am likely to get cut anyway. Seniority hurts sometimes.

Have been thinking on how to make economies myself. Smaller apartment, no garage, cut out internet, no home phone and just keep the cell. But I don't want to do any of that. Shop more at Goodwill and consignment, which I tend to do anyway. Car is almost paid for, which is nice. Had a haircut today - which costs and arm and two legs, every 6-8 weeks. My cosmetologist said to let her know, and she and I can talk about how we can make things cheaper. I promised her I'd never fall in with evil companions and go to Great Clips. She laughed and said she'd hunt me down if I did.

Funny how a tiny little thing like that can make me feel better.

Anyway. That's depressing. What else...

Changed my computer wallpaper to a picture of my cats. Can't "p" again. Need to replace this keyboard but am too cheap, especially now. They're changing the carpeting in the hallways of my apartment building so my whole apartment smells like glue. The cats are going to get high pretty soon, unless they are already - L is already attempting to modify my post with her attention to the mouse and the keyboard. Already deleted several sentences; yay for the inventor of "undo." Designed a card for the selling crafts stuff thing I've been toying with. Dunno how serious I am about any of this but it's an exercise. Don't like the look of them but not sure what's bugging me. They look amateurish. paper is decent; maybe it's how they're cut. Idunno.

Went to the big jugglefest last weekend and got closer to learning to juggle. That's just about the best people watching on earth. Anything that includes combat juggling and unicycle hockey is bound to be good. I even got up on a unicycle myself and with C's help managed to get at least a half turn of the wheel before I fell off. Good times. And J didn't knock himself in a particularly sensitive place so hard he fell over and curled into a fetal position, like what happened last time I went. Life is good.

Enough babbling for now, doncha think? I'd best pet the cat and distract her before things really get out of hand...

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Chair Model

Aaannnnddd... this is why I love The Office: episodes like tonight. Funny, romantic, sad, awkward, and pathetic, all in 22 minutes.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Sumer is a cumin in

Went to a tiki bar today after work and...

Got. To. Sit. Outside.

Can you believe it?! Finally. FINALLY. The weather is nice enough to actually be outside for more than 30 seconds, and without a coat, too. Granted, we did bag it and go inside within an hour or two, but still.

And I am now the proud owner of a new tiki mug, whom we have christianed Mr. Smead. He's going in my office with the naked lady swizzle stick. A profitable evening.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Deregulation

The whole thing with the FAA and the airlines and things not being inspected....

"It's all sort of ironic, when you think about it. When you fly, YOU are inspected quite thoroughly, whereas the plane itself is, perhaps, occasionally vacuumed. See, with this administration, if a passenger blows up a plane, it's a 'failure in the war on terror,' but if the plane just blows up on its own, it's 'the market self-regulating.' '' - Jon Stewart

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Lightbulbs?!?

Wow.

This woman is a lunatic and an embarrassment. I wouldn't believe this except, knowing her track record, it makes a sick kind of sense. With all the things in this world she could spend time - and taxpayer dollars - on, she chooses to fight the good fight about light bulbs. Light bulbs!

This of course begs a comment about her being a dim bulb herself, but I'll refrain.

Please, oh please, vote her out of office. Someone. Anyone.


http://www.startribune.com/politics/national/house/17002506.html?page=1&c=y

Bachmann is pro-choice on bulbs

March 25, 2008

WASHINGTON - How many members of Congress does it take to change a light bulb? Americans may soon find out, courtesy of a contrarian piece of legislation introduced this month by Rep. Michele Bachmann of Minnesota.

Titled the "Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act," the bill seeks to repeal the nationwide phase-out of conventional light bulbs, the kind that have been used for more than a century -- pretty much since the invention of the incandescent light bulb.

Bachmann, a first-term Republican, is challenging the nation's embrace of energy-efficient compact fluorescent lights, saying the government has no business telling consumers what kind of light bulbs they can buy.

"This is an issue of science over fads and fashions," Bachmann said in an interview Tuesday.

"Congress tends to jump on whatever the current buzz is in the 24-hour news cycle, " Bachmann said.

Her bill, the first challenge of its kind, raises safety questions about the small amounts of mercury in fluorescent lights. It also lands her squarely in the middle of the debate over global warming. In recent remarks to a gathering of Sherburne County Republicans -- reported in the West Sherburne Tribune -- Bachmann called any human connection to global warming "voodoo, nonsense, hokum, a hoax."

"By 2012, incandescent light bulbs will be no more," Bachmann said. "Fluorescent bulbs are more polluting because of their mercury content. We are working on a light bulb bill. If the Democrats can hose up a light bulb, don't trust them with the country."

The electrical and manufacturing industries, in a rare alliance with environmentalists, portray Bachmann's mercury concerns as overblown. They argue that fluorescent lights actually reduce mercury emissions in the long run. That's because the new bulbs use so much less electricity, much of which is produced by burning coal, which emits greenhouse gases and mercury.

"That's not just the industry talking," said Mark Kohorst of the National Electrical Manufacturers Association. "That's an accepted aspect of these products, and that's why they've been promoted so heavily."

Whatever one's views on global warming, Kohorst said, the energy savings of fluorescent lights are real. "The lamp thing has merit," he said. "Unfortunately, [Bachmann] has lumped it in with this whole conspiracy thing."

Environmentalists are more emphatic in downplaying the mercury hazards of fluorescent bulbs, which they say are minimal.

"There is 200 times more mercury in each filling in Congresswoman Bachmann's teeth than there is in a compact fluorescent light bulb," said Julia Bovey, a spokeswoman for the Natural Resources Defense Council.

The federal government is also on board, with Congress' last energy bill, signed by President Bush in December, having mandated a phase-in to energy-saving bulbs starting in 2012.

But in a letter to congressional colleagues earlier this month, Bachmann asked for support of her legislation to reverse that mandate, unless a comptroller general report shows clear economic, health and environmental benefits from the switchover to fluorescent lights.

Her letter says that the energy bill "forces consumers and businesses to use only light bulbs chosen for them by the government" and that further study "is simple due diligence."

Mercury disposal an issue

The mercury content of fluorescent light bulbs has long been a concern of federal and state regulators. Minnesota is one of a handful of states that ban the disposal of fluorescent lights as general waste, and Xcel Energy, the state's biggest utility, actively reimburses many customers for recycling them.

The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) and Minnesota Pollution Control Agency (MPCA) outline a series of steps that homeowners should take to clean up broken fluorescent lights: Open windows, use rubber gloves, dispose of all material in sealed bags and remove it to a hazardous waste facility.

"It's almost as if you have to call the haz-mat team out to your home," Bachmann said.

Environmentalists argue that most of the steps are the same as cleanup from any broken glass accident, except for the special disposal requirements.

Industry experts say the amount of mercury in new compact fluorescent lights -- about 5 milligrams, on average -- is small but significant enough to warrant common-sense safety precautions and consumer recycling efforts to keep it out of landfills.

"There are minuscule amounts of mercury, but it's a hazardous waste, and we want to take it seriously," said Kim Sherman, product portfolio manager at Xcel Energy.

MPCA spokesman Sam Brungardt said the use of compact fluorescent lights, which use one-fourth the energy of regular bulbs, should certainly be encouraged. If new legislation is needed, he said, it should be to encourage consumers to recycle. "You have to make it easy to do this," he said.

Growing market

With or without the help of Congress, the market for compact fluorescent lights is growing. They are now more than 20 percent of the consumer market in the United States, up from 1 percent in 2001, according to Steve Rosenstock of the Edison Electric Institute.

"These bulbs use significantly less energy, so consumers can save lots of money by switching over," said Jason Mathers of the Environmental Defense Fund.

Fluorescent bulbs, however, cost several dollars more than regular household light bulbs, a factor that Congress failed to take into account when it passed its new mandate, Bachmann said.

For her, changing a light bulb should remain a matter of personal freedom.

"I was just outraged that Congress would want to substitute its judgment for the judgment of the American people," she said. "It struck me as a massive Big Brother intrusion into our homes and our lives."

Kevin Diaz • 202-408-2753